Day 2: barely ate anything

This is day 2 after smoking heavy this year smoking over an oz a week barely gettin high then started smoking shatter and crumble again burning myself about 4 times with the torch, nail on my forearms and hands. Since 5 pm yesterday and now it’s 7 pm today I haven’t been able to move or go anywhere, I also can’t eat, nothing seems appealing to me, I think today I had 200 calories so far wtf and I don’t even wanna eat but I’m pretty fit and don’t wanna lose weight

I also relapsed on Xanax in the summer after being a year clean, so now I’m 40 days clean after switching to Valium and now tapering my Valium

Anyway, I’m a heavy poly drug abuser, you can see in my posts I been trying to quit Weed for over 4+ years, but I dealt with health problems and turned to heavy use of benzos, opiates, stimulants, and whatever I can get.

Following breaking my back at 21, I wasn’t expecting to make it to 22 or 23, but I’m turning 25 in February, I have decided to go completely straight edge to go through my benzo withdrawal as it’s the hardest.

I also did my tattoo apprenticeship this year, and I’ll be getting my art degree for transfer next semester. I’m moving on with my life and moving away from the high life to see where my art will take me

I’ve also been surviving on the dope game since breaking my back and I’m fuckin sick of it too. I want all the dope out of my life and stop trapping asap.

Of course they fired me from the tattoo shop after putting 50+ hours a week for free for 9 months, paid me $150 a week for a month then fired me. Unfortunately, now I have to build myself up from home to get into a good shop.

I’ll be taking this chance as a blessing to focus on my art degree while staying completely clean, because when I start making money from tattooing and my art, none of it will go to dope and that’s a game changer as I will be able to build myself and surpass all the “high” artists wasting their time on getting high

I’ll be more active on here to motivate and stay motivated

Submitted October 13, 2018 at 05:14AM by Mushies94 https://ift.tt/2A8nlZQ