Chronic fatigue/brain fog due to undiagnosed ADD?

Male, 23, 5’10, 165 lbs, White

My health has felt like it’s been in the crapper for way too long. When I was 12-13 I was diagnosed with mild GERD (acid reflux). Right around this time I also started developing a bit of general anxiety, but again wasn't debilitating. And then, starting around age 16, I woke up one day and noticed I was a little tired for some odd reason. I have been tired ever since that day. Not even a day or a minute of feeling well again. I've gradually gotten tireder and tireder over the course of the past 7-8 years, to the point where I'm at now where I can hardly function because the exhaustion and resulting symptoms have become so debilitating. So basically, my life revolves around me being exhausted.

Many of the symptoms below have been here since the fatigue started, but have very gradually gotten worse and worse as time continues to goes by.

SYMPTOMS:

· Chronic fatigue 24/7 that has gradually gotten worse and worse over 7-8 year span. More of a mental exhaustion/burned out feeling than sleepy, but has escalated to sleepy now as well

· Non-restorative sleep. I do feel a teeny bit better if I get 10+ hours of sleep though

· Drugged/hungover type feeling 24/7, especially in the evening/night time

· Energy is now non-existent

· Cognitive decline (Concentration, alertness, memory, focus, BRAIN FOG, processing/recalling/stumbling over words and sentences, confusion, etc.)

· Low arousal

· Monotone speech

· Fidgeting often (picking nails mostly)

· Anxious/stressed/overwhelmed more easily. Everything is a chore

· Feel guilty easily

· Perfectionist/high standards kind of person. High IQ, high expectations for myself. I also tend to internalize often

· Decision making is awful

· Balance/coordination feels off. Started bumping into things lately, tripping over self

· Motor skills decline

· Hand-eye coordination decline

· Spatial awareness decline

· Dizziness upon standing often

· Night sweats often

· Hypersomnia (Usually fall asleep very easily, rarely have insomnia)

· Eye floaters 24/7

· Light sensitivity (seem more sensitive to bright light/sunlight)

· Yawning throughout the day

· Numbness all over body. Tough to explain, but extremities/body parts feel so utterly exhausted and numb-like to the touch. Like I can feel my arm getting touched by my hand, but can’t feel my hand touching my arm.

· Senses feel dulled. Hearing, taste, smell, touch, all feel weakened and suppressed

· Libido low. Orgasm feels much less intense

· Alcohol usually hits me much harder now. As a result, I feel intoxicated more easily/quickly

· Have a perpetual drunk-like feeling like I'm not quite in real life. Never fully feel "there"

· Slow now both mentally and physically

· Head almost always feels very tired and heavy

· Tilt head to the side often. Lately have developed a bit of a very subtle head jerk

· Skin seems worse (Dryness, zits, marks, etc)

· Involuntary weight loss

· Anhedonia and apathy as I’ve gotten tireder and tireder. I have gradually become indifferent to most things. I literally come across as an emotionless zombie now because I am so damn exhausted 24/7. Almost nothing phases or interests me anymore. I am emotionally flat lined.

ADDITIONAL INFO:

I find it kind of weird that even strong stuff like Adderall, Modafinil, caffeine, kratom, CBD, or 4 different antidepressants/anxieties make virtually no difference in me, no matter the dosage. It sometimes makes me feel a little anxious/on edge, but that's about it. Exercise doesn't really seem to affect me one way or another, I do not suffer from insomnia (in fact I fall asleep very easily most nights), don’t get headaches super often, I have not been exposed to toxic mold (lived in 5 different places since this started), my diet is extremely healthy, appetite is good, I do not have any joint pain, never had surgery, stay very well hydrated, my childhood and family life are extremely well, I have slightly elevated CO2 levels in my blood (but nothing dangerous), slightly elevated bilirubin levels, slightly elevated B12 levels, WBC on the lower end of normal, and slightly elevated ferritin levels.

I was diagnosed about 5 months ago with very mild mixed sleep apnea (AHI of 6.5) and have been using a CPAP machine but have not noticed any improvement with fatigue or fogginess. Although the CPAP has gotten rid of my near nightly bad night sweats, I noticed as soon as I stop CPAP the sweating comes back

TESTS + THINGS DONE/TRIED:

Blood panels tests, urinary tests, vitamin serum/mineral deficiency checks, hormones, diabetes, heart scan, chest scans, head MRI, cortisol AM and PM levels, HIV, hepatitis, celiac, anemia, food allergy testing, full thyroid testing, antibodies, h. pylori, ENT doctor to rule out any structural issues.

Four SSRIs, Modafinil, kratom, CBD edibles, probiotics, a few months using a CPAP machine for very mild mixed sleep apnea, methylated B12 supplements, methylated folate, more sunlight/sports, no sex/masturbating, more caffeine/no caffeine, glucose tablets, quality dark chocolate, antihistamines, diet changes, more exercise/less exercise, therapy, meditation and deep breathing exercises, spiritual healing, sleeping elevated, taping my mouth closed when I sleep, saw a couple naturopathic docs, and SO MANY damn supplements including kava kava, chamomile, 5-HTP, B12, ashwagandha, magnesium, melatonin, fish oil, vitamin D3,

Overall, it feels like I was hit by a truck. From the moment I wake up to the moment I pass out from sheer exhaustion at night. Everything feels like it's suppressed by this fog that has gradually gotten worse and worse over time. For example, caffeine’s effect, sex drive, post-workout adrenaline and endorphins, getting plenty of sleep, etc. I can sort of FEEL all these things for the most part, but it feels hidden and pushed down from this utter exhaustion. It’s like nothing can surpass the fatigue and fog. It's gotten to the point where I feel like I'm living my life from the backseat and am just going through the day mindlessly. And the thing that sucks is that I want to do things and live life, and am still pretty optimistic, but I'm just too fucking out of it, it's embarrassing.

Regarding ADD/ADHD. Up until very recently, it never crossed my mind, as I have always falsely assumed you had to be hyperactive, which I never really was. But the more I've learned and heard from other people and what they've gone through, the more I am starting to believe undiagnosed ADD might be my problem all along. I've gone all these years masking my symptoms unmedicated using lots of brain power and coping mechanisms, and using anxiety/stress to push myself hard to get anything done to the point of exhaustion I feel like. I've always assumed it was a personality trait/flaw, and that I just couldn't keep up with everyone else. Looking back to my childhood, I've always felt sort of disconnected. Had difficulty with math/science throughout school I think due to not being able to concentrate/follow along and then reciprocate that on homework and tests. I did pretty well though in writing and language arts. I received good grades for the most part, but frequently received low marks in effort. I've never had a girlfriend, never really had super close friendships or people that really confided in me or vice versa, and have for a long time known something was off, just couldn't figure out what exactly. I have heard that a low dopamine brain is desperately searching for stimulus, but can't find it because lack of dopamine and such = nothing being rewarding or stimulating. So, when it finds something that DOES stimulate it, it latches on HARD - even if that stimulus is firmly on the negative side of the spectrum. Suddenly, you're obsessing over something that stresses you out massively. This is also why ADHD can cause anxiety and depression, or why it might be misdiagnosed as one of the two.

Thoughts?

Submitted May 06, 2019 at 12:33AM by Zheshi http://bit.ly/2PM3xSd