I can’t do this shit anymore. I’m on another plane of existence, IM A FUCKING GOD. I AM A FULL BLOWN PSYCHOPATH, but at the same time I’m not, I love everyone. BUT AGAIN IM FUCKING NOT, I WANT TO KILL SOMOME. I WANT TO BRUTALLY MURDER ANY DUMB BRICK HEADED FUCKING IDIOT THAT IF I KILL I CAN GET AWAY WITH IT. AHAHAakakakoapajkanananan FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK IM A FUCKING CRAZY PERSON, I feel so isolated, but not the the, “oooh boohoo I’m so lonely no one understands me” bullshit I’m on a different level then fucking everyone. WHOOOOOOHOO IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE no one can comprehend the state I’m in. I want to become someone who has a legacy on this world, I want to change the world in a good way. I want to help people, I want to create art that truly reflects the place I’m in. BUT ILL NEVER REACH THAT BECAUSE IM A LOSER WHO HAS NO MOTIVATION BECAUSE IVE LOST IT, I TRIED GOING SOBER BUT IVE JUST BECOME MORE OF A MONSTER, ONCE I GOT BACK I JUST DID MORE AND MORE ANR MORE AND MORE ALRKAKALLLlasjhdbdbsb FUCKEVERYONE. I feel like I control everything, but I don’t. Just all the things in my life. I’m really not a bad person, I care about a lot of things, my family, my friends, my dogs, and a lot of other things but even then everything is so meaningless and dark. It’s just some stretched out TV show and I’m the only one watching it. And just be fact that I’m crying out on this stupid sub that probably no one will even notice this post, and Even then the fact that I am posting on reddit for other people’s attention about getting help even though I know I’ll never tell my family about my problems and I’ll continue to pretend I’m the better kid unlike My Brother who over dosed on XANS but I’m going down the same path, even worse. I WANT TO DO SOMETHING BUT ALL I CAN DO IS NOTHING. I HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL EVERYDAY AND SIT AND LEARN AND GET GOOD GRADE AND THE MINUTE MY PARENTS START DRUG TESTING ME THEY GO, “ooooh fox your doing so much better after not smoking! I really feel as if I’ve gotten my son back!” I LOVE YOU BUT FUCK YOU WEED WAS MY ONLY WAS TO COPE WITH THIS REALM THAT IM STUCK IN AND YOU TOOK THAT AWAY FROM ME. IM NOT MY FUCKING BROTHER FUCK FUCK FUCK. IM IN A SIMULATION NOTHING IS REAL AND IT IS REAL BUT ITS SO MEANINGLESS THAT IT MIGHT AS WELL BE A FUUUUUCKING STUPID SIMULATION. WHY WHY WHY WHY. Ooooh lucky me I’m a smart person, FUCK YOU FOX. Thanks fox! YOUR CRAZY. You must really need some help dude! NO NO NO NO NO NO. Why are you doing this on a public internet sub? Your not going to kill you self lol you love your family to much you stupid idiot. IM NOT STUPID IM A FUCKING GOD. when will it end hahahahahahahahhahahahahaahhahahahahaha. Life is funny. Guessssss what? IM FREEEEEEEEEEEEE. I DONT FEEL PAIN ANYMORE. IM A MORTAL BEING FULLY AWARE OF EVERYTHING HAPPING. IM A FUCKING GOD FUCK. But I’m not crazy. I’m highly functional, it’s just I want to do it my way. If this is my TV show why can’t I do it my way? Why do I have to follow the rules of my parents drug tests? Why do I have to get good grades? Why do I have to get a successful career? BECAUSE YOU DO FOX. BECAUSE YOU DO. YOUR TO MUCH OF A FUCKING PUSSY TO BREEEEEAAAAK THE SIMULATION. so what should I do!? please find out on the next episode of crazy person on channel 20XX to find out! Fox signing out :)just kidding it never ends, wow surprised you have read all of my ramblings. Do I sound crazy? “Yes you do!” Well what even what can I do? everyday I wake up with a different attitude. I’m not always “depressed” I’m never depressed, I’m fucking dying. But then I’m not. Then I realize this is all stupid and I’m a just being silly, oh fox hahaha your so silly sometimes. BUT A DAY LATER IM BACK IM BACK TO THE TV SHOW. AM I THE ONLT ONE WATCHING IT? ARE YOU? Am I just a crazy person who you think you can understand what’s happening? Or am I just a crazy person. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK I WANT TO KILLLLLLLL. But I don’t, probably why I end up enjoying watching people die so much hhahahahahaha. But I don’t. When I see someone die I feel the pain they are in, the pain it causes their family. I’m a good guy. I’m not always this way. BUT THEN A FUUCKING DAY LATER I FANTASIZE ABOUT SHOOTING SOMOME WITH A NAIL GUN. Oh god. I’m insane. I’m really making myself sound like a total nut case here, but I’m off the rails at the moment. It’s better be doing this in front of random people on The internet than people I know, right? Hahahahaha fuck fuck fuck. Dude your insane, there must be something wrong with you! Idk haha Maybe there is i don’t mind though I’m just Expressing my thoughts! No your not your having a mental breakdown. Nahhhhh. That can’t be it! I WANT TO LIVE LIKE A NORMAL PERSON WHY DID I HAVE TO BE BORN IN A FAMILY LIKE THIS. THEY DID THIS TO ME. I COULD OF BEEN BORN IN A NOOOORMAL FAMILY AND JUST LIVE. BUT I DONT WANT THAT. I enjoy the way I’m living, I feel as if I’m some kinda of super human, so whatever hahaha. Thanks! How many times are You going to edit this fox? How much “details” do you need to add to this shitshow? I’m so sorry for all the spelling mistakes Please don’t think I’m stupid. It’s not the fact that I’m insecure, not at all. I love myself (((((not really dumbass))))) I just care about my image. I want people to view Let the way I want them to. But they never will, because everyone is not me. Like just because I’m a dude and like to have romantic relationships with other men will destroy my image. I get people will be accepting of it and all that bullshit but it will change the way people approach and talk to me. It will change the fabric of my most important relationships. I JUST WANT TO BE SOMOME GREAT. BUT IF THE FACT THAT I LIKE KISSING BOYS TARNISHES MY IMAGE THEN ILL JUST STOP, I CANT HANG OUT WITH NORMAL DUDES IF THEY HAVE ANY IDEA IN THEIR MINDS THAT IM SOMEWHAT GAY. IM NOT EVEN FULLY GAY. WHY DOES THIS MATTER, it’s all just in my mind. This is all just my TV show. Isn’t that what life just is?
Submitted November 20, 2018 at 09:28AM by zzzzzzzzxzzzzzzzzzz https://ift.tt/2FwFXYb
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