Saturday, November 30, 2019

Skelter+Heaven 10/10 Reviews

Tenkuu Danzai Skelter+Heaven is rated 1.91 on MAL. Let's look at the 10 point reviews.


After watching the sublime beauty that was Mars of Destruction, I figured it was impossible for Yoshiteru Satou and company to top themselves. Somehow, they managed to do just that through Skelter Heaven, possibly the single greatest work in the history of any medium of film. A truly nerve-bludgeoning and relentlessly exciting masterpiece.

I remain perpetually amazed by how magnificently Satou keeps the tension up; there is not a single moment in this 19-minute OVA that isn't operating at 100%. Throughout the duration of this relatively short episode, the audience is presented with enthralling dialogue, a galvanizing plotline, exhilarating action, and heartbreaking tragedy. At times, I found myself on the edge of my seat, only to be left in tears moments afterward. The spontaneous dynamic of this show is unlike anything I have ever witnessed, and it’s unlikely I’ll ever come across anything that’ll come close (other than the great Mars of Destruction, of course).

The production of this OVA was so superb, it's almost hard to imagine that this was a low-budget film made over a decade ago. The fluid movements of the main villain (a goddamn giant squid) for example, were pure eye candy. The art is comparable to the works of the great artists of the Renaissance, such as Michelangelo and da Vinci. The lip-syncing was about as on-point as any animated film I've ever seen. Even the sound was exquisite; the voice acting of the characters were packed with tremendous emotion, and the soundtrack was as majestic as the sound of thousands of golden harps raining down from the acreage of heaven. If you value an anime's quality of production, you will not be disappointed.

What else is there left to say? Skelter Heaven is a masterpiece among masterpieces, one I strongly recommend you all to watch immediately.


Where do I begin with this masterpiece. I cried with tears of joy when I was able to bear witness to pure beauty. Truly such art is not worthy to be seen by such lowly eyes as mine.

SPOILER WARNING

This show will make you reconsider everything you thought you knew about the world. The layers of depth and understanding it possesses are beyond human comprehension.

The show starts with a full minute of low res earth footage over a monotonous heartbeat. This is a clear reference to low fi hip-hop beats to relax/study to. And is clearly an criticism of man's over-reliance on such vices. The monotonous sound works its way into your brain through repetition as it slowly drives you insane. This puts you in the mindset of the author who feels like he is being driven mad by society.

The VN intro provides insight on how fake and plastic our society has become. Relying on such images of cute girls in still poses to satisfy our impulses and desires. The music is off-key to give you a sense of unease that these girls might just be plastic and fake and the reality that this show presents may be hyper-reality and these girls are actually just a fake representation of man's desire for objectification.

This leads into the shows direct commentary on objectification culture by making the girls literally artificial clones who's only purpose is to satisfy the desires of their masters. Note, the appearance of this backstory in the middle of a battle scene amplifies the conflict created by society between men and women and this battle is perfectly exemplified by the Lins declaration of "I love you" which is only met by awkward silence. Misaki's desire to be seen as worthwhile is another example of this show's feminist message.

The artificial beings don't fear death because the are simple programmed to subsume themselves to society. This is a clear message about how society breaks down the individual and turns them into a mindless drone only to exist as a service to society. This a marxist critique of capitalistic society and systems through which needs are met through objectification and pandering. This patriarchy.

The editing is confusing and sublime in its presentation, you are expected to read deep into the abstract symbolism it displays. The mashing together of scenes in a way that seems chaotic. The long pauses between dialogue symbolises the absurd nature of our reality. The repetition of lines is to drive the message of the show home. The deep message about consumer culture and a message about how the girl is a tool used by society to destroy the squid monster. Exemplified by the line "It is not the tool that is at fault, it is the user."

The squid itself is a direct representation of the scapegoating immigrants as the real problem with society, the squid however does not attack until provoked. This shows our misguided approach to foreign policy. Our decisions to attack those who are different will result in only in a greater cycle of violence emphasised by the squids return in greater numbers.

The anime then circles back to the heartbeat to emphasis that al these problems are secondary to the plague of lo-fi hip-hop beats to study/relax to upon society.

This anime truly changed my life. Maybe I have shared with you just some of it majesty. But this shows is so abstract and divine that it cannot ever be fully understood. Evangelion pales into comparison to this masterpiece. Evangelion wishes it could be as profound as this show.


STORY The story is, what again, absolutely amazing. Some sexy squid came down to save earth with its sexyness. Those evil robot women came and tried to stop them. This is brilliant. you shall watch just because of the amazing story. Some of the annoying girls got blown up and I laughed so hard. They did a love story too, but the squid automatically makes it 10/10. So good.

ART They made the squid so sexy. Also, the first minute is probably one of the best minutes of my life. You need to see for yourself. The animation is just pure gold, no, diamond, no, antimatter, yes. The animation is antimatter. The squid. They had to make the girls so goddamn ugly. They had to show some weird ahegao face on one of the girls. I dont want to see that. I wanted to poor bleach into my eyes, the squid saved me from doing that.

SOUND Pure antimatter. is there something any rarer? If there is, this is it.

The first minute should just show how good sound can be in anime.

The voice acting was really good. The quality of the mics they used was good.

Character Squid. The squid The squid was so sexy His personality is definitely there, especially for a main villian. The squi. And the girls are there They made me want to die. But the squid. The girls tried to attack the squid.

Enjoyment. It is very enjoyable. The scenes with the girls were bad. The scene with the squid were amazing


Too long, have I been watching shows where I understood what was happening. Too long also, have I been watching fully animated shows, when instead I should have been watching the glorious mix of visual novel and non-animation that this OVA delights viewers with. For an 18 minute OVA I'm glad they didn't fall in to the trap that previous writers have, in actually trying to tell a story, instead, showing me several flashbacks and a good 3 minutes of scenery.


Tenkuu Danzai Skelter+Heaven is an horribly underrated timeless classic for only those of the finest taste to enjoy. It perfectly balances everything that is right with anime into a sleek 18-minute package for the whole family to enjoy.

That being said,

STORY & CHARACTERS

Skelter+Heaven details the harsh struggles of Earth's military forces combating invaders from outer space. To do this, they use strong female warriors genetically enhanced to combat these beasts in ther giant Gundams.

Right off the bat, this is an excellent plot with amazing potential to do only the best. The characters are all introduced one by one, each with their own brief introduction, with only the classiest methods, of course. We sense their inner struggle. We FEEL it.

The final scene where they fight the monster is excellent as well, for it truly can make one ask thought-provoking questions.

ANIMATION AND SOUND

Now, Skelter+Heaven was made in 2004, and uses lots of CG. This may throw some people off, but personally, I found it to be quite enjoyable to look at. All of the cuts are swift, and the CG is implemented seamlessly. Not to mention the AMAZING ADR direction.

OVERALL

Skelter+Heaven is a marvel of animation that deserves to be viewed by all, for it truly is the saving grace of anime


"It is not the fault of the product. It depends on the human who uses it. That is always the problem."

This is the primordial theme of this wonder work of brilliance. The story starts with a giant squid from space who randomly appears in Tokyo, Japan. For some reason it is up to our hero female artificially produced from a group of strange individuals. One of which are in love with our male protagonist for no apparent reason.

The state of the art art, is up to 2014 standards. Brilliant technology that exceeds even the work of Aniplex, and sometimes even Toei productions. Legendary brilliance. Do not even get me started on phenomenal sound, this lip sync is just done phenomenally well. You can hear word by japanese word the words coming out of these peoples mouth.

Now for the legendary characters. I'll just leave this here. "Commander, how long can I live?"

You will enjoy this thoroughly, as for this is a comedy film meant for comedy.


After you watch this masterpiece, there's no doubt that this is your favorite anime of all time. No discussion, that's a fact. Let me put in this way, if you think that your taste is good, prove it giving a big 10 to this wonderful japanese cartoon.

Where should I start? I mean, it's impossible to describe such amazing object of art using a human vocabulary, so bear with me.

Story - 10 Complete innovation here guys, where can you find an anime about big mechas fighting some big flying octopus? Nowhere, that's right.

Art - 10 Don't let me start, hold my hands plz or I'll put my whole life here describing the effort put in this incredible artwork. While watching I had a sudden insight that if I wanted to make something like this I could. But after some seconds the truth came into my mind... no I can't. Maybe my 2 years son, if he really tries.

Sound - 10 After spending 1500 dollars on headset, finally I achieved the highest enjoyment in my life!

Character - 10 Everyone is Waifu material. Yes, even the male ones. Why not?

Enjoyment - 10 Now I can say to people that my brain have scars all around. That's obviously because this show really put some pressure inside your skull. Make you reconsider your life...

The real problem tho... after appreciating this you will never reach the same happiness level in your life.

Case closed.


I know why you’re here. You know why you’re here. You’re here because you’ve found the lowest rated anime on the whole website. The “worst anime of all time”. If you are actually considering watching this, then it is because you want to experience the worst anime of all time. Isn’t that right, you masochistic sonuvabitch?

Well, in that case, you have come to the right place. Tenkuu Danzai Skelter+Heaven is the perfect way to experience the worst anime ever. This is because it does not have a single unironically appealing quality to it, apart from one.

The one appealing quality of this anime is that it’s just one 20-minute episode. This means that you will not lose as much of your life by watching this as you would by watching, say, The Asterisk War (which at least has a couple of redeeming qualities, though they fail to make up for the fact that it goes on any longer than 20 minutes).

As for the story itself, it is rather hard to describe. This is because I have no clue what the fuck it was trying to say. It was just some events, the significance of which it was hard to grasp, and some incredibly weak attempts to get the viewer emotionally invested. Attempts so weak, that I’m not even sure if that’s what they were actually going for. Were they even going for anything?

I don’t remember too much of the plot, but it basically involves a giant monster that looks much like the globglogabgalab if He had decided to shapeshift (which He can do, by the way) into an enormous kite. I would use a more interesting word than kite, but that would be to imply that there was anything interesting about this creature (aside from its slight resemblance to the globglogabgalab). This creature remains completely still, but apparently it was posing some sort of threat...?

There are two reasons that I don’t remember the plot very well: the first is that it was utterly forgettable (even the parts that could properly be comprehended by the human brain), and the second is that I am absolutely unwilling to re-watch it for the sake of this review, because even I have some slight sense of self-preservation when it comes to my psychological well-being; watching this anime isn’t exactly what one would call a pleasant experience.

As for the characters, they are even more forgettable. One of them did something at some point, and then there was also the one who talked to the one who did something so that was cool and exciting I guess…? Okay, perhaps not. The characters are great, because they’re so forgettable, that I don’t have any mental scars left behind from them as I do for the plot. (At least, no mental scars that I’m aware of.)

The animation is really nice, because it makes you feel better about your inadequacies, knowing that, no matter how much you suck, at least you’re not Tenkuu Danzai Skelter+Heaven’s animation.

So far, this review might seem as though it has been rather negative, so you may be wondering as to why I gave this show a 10. You see, as I said earlier: I know why you’re here, you masochistic sonuvabitch.


Frankly an amazing anime. I don't know where to begin, just like the show writers. In any case, if you've ever felt the need to watch an entire season in 23 minutes, this is your show. The character development was unlike any other, to be honest, I felt culturally enriched.

It had everything an anime needed: fan service, good looking characters, and an awesome story. Frankly, I can't even say what the best scene was, there was too much amazing-ness for me to handle. I think if you're bored and want to see something amazing, this is the way to go. There is nothing else like it, except that one Picasso anime. I highly recommend this anime, 10/10 its a mastah piece


This is the greatest piece of animation i have seen in a long long time. It may have only been an 18 minutes OVA but it has touched my heart in ways many other anime have never done. If you have not watched this great series you should go and watch it now.

Art - The art style for it is a simple yet effective one that both draws attention to the action scenes within but also to the beautifully draws backgrounds which litter the great scenes.

Story - The story is a gripping and intense story about a giant monster invading the city of Tokyo and our heroes must fight to defeat the creature before it destroys the city.

Sound - The sound for the series contains many pieces which I will listen to multiple times and will probably follow me though my life

Character - The Characters in the OVA are well told and have a deep story is given to them in such a short time span. personally i believe that lin is the greatest character as she had the most time given to her.

My Enjoyment - Personally I will add this series to my top 10 and will most likely re watch on multiple occasions.

But seriously this is the Greatest Anime you will ever watch.


"I haven't been following your orders because I had to, It's because... I love you."

Masterfully crafted, Skelter+Heaven is the very reason I watch anime. Every single moment I was on edge, and it will make you laugh and cry in the span of 18 minutes. I was a mess when I watched this anime, because I couldn't decide whether to cry or laugh. It was so good that I had to play it in 2x speed because I couldn't take the tears.

Story - I couldn't even comprehend the story it was so good. I won't spoil you on anything tho. A giant squid attacks a city and a team of girls in mecha suits have to go stop it, suffering heartbreak and tragedy in order to achieve their goal. The one girl even told that guy that she loved him after having two flashbacks before she died. THIS IS HEARTBREAKING!! I just know I'll be depressed and unmotivated to live for weeks after seeing this fantastic, stunning film. It has completely changed me!!

The thing is though, that if you think it's not sad, Misaki and Midori died. Misaki is also the best waifu, so it's very sad to see her die.

Art - THE ART IS STUNNING!! It takes me back to my childhood and I just love it! With all the colours and the amazing 3D animation (in particular of the squid), this anime tops any others I've seen! It's beautiful, it's just... wow! The design of each character is unique and beautiful to the point where they all seem like background characters and yet they're not, which is amazing! I've never seen anything like this, and even if the rest of this anime hadn't been good, I would watch it for the amazing art alone! It's just like a Studio Ghilbi film!

Sound - The sound. Omg. The weird wooshing sounds in the background and lack of music really set the tone for this masterpiece. The amazing, catchy theme song and tearjerker ending song absolutely stole me away! The staticky sounds and the high-pitched screams of the main character in her dying stages were amazing! They were heartfelt and you could really feel emotion in them, unlike other animes which fail to convey that. Also the danger song is amazing since it really puts you there in that situation with them!

Character - Ah, the characters... they were so good! In the span of 18 minutes we saw cool side characters that were so great I couldn't even distinguish their personality, a love interest that was so fantastic that he became boring, and immense character development with the main character! With fantastic flashbacks that really set the move, what can I say? The characters were fantastic in this anime, but I'd have to say that my most favourite was the squid. It was so mysterious, and it really made you think, "what could this guy be going through?!"

Enjoyment - Laughter and tears. 2x speed. Eyes locked on the screen. It's beautiful.


The show is a bit confusing at times as it jumps around to flashbacks for no apparent reason, and a sudden admission of love for no reason out of nowhere makes almost no sense. But it seems like the creators tried to fit too much in too short a time frame. The "training" scene seems a bit much, and makes me wonder what the animators were thinking at the time. But the concept behind the anime is interesting, and could have been a greater story than it was. If given time to tell the story in a full movie and expand on what they were trying to get at in this, they could have pulled it off. As it is, I still find it worth watching.


Definitely best anime ever made.

I have never watched any other anime with such an intersting trama. The story development was flawless, the use of flashbacks was perfect, they showed very important aspects of the story to be able to understand it as a whole. Animation, on the other hand, is absolutely gorgeous, you can easily appreate it with character design and such natural movements that feel very life like, the battles had such an strong impact, i could even feel the attacks the squid made to the mechas, such devastating scenes at the end where you could apreciate the damage made, and do not forget that clear sky that turned cloudy in very good way emphasizing the moments of tranquility and madness. Best use of CGI so far, not even Land of the Lustrous had such marvelous models, the mechas had so many moving parts, and were made very realistic with that clunky feeling they emitted with every movement.

Sound mixing was worth an Oscar, creators must have developed a new way of sound editing to make it feel very natural with the animation, such coordinated voices were astonishing, the sound from the guns madem me think for a moment that the battle was taking place near me.

Favorite anime, worth watching and 100% recommendable for everyone joining the anime world.

10/10 would watch again.

So good it could even cure cancer, and very possibly you could even resell it nowadays, i think that the money it would make would help solve the world hunger and the poverty that strikes nations around the world.

Please watch so you dont get ligma or sugma.

Ps: Please never become Sugondesu


(this one is not even a review)

Honestly, this brought tears to my eyes. There was nothing more fabulous and marvelous than this. This can not be put in words, as it was jaw dropping. The story, 10/10, the art, 10/10, the sound 10/10, the characters 10/10, the enjoyment 10/10, the overall 10/10. Definitely an upgrade from Mars of Direction and better than Cory in the House or Attack on Mexico. I honestly believe that Manko has potential to be the next Hokage.

Once upon a terribly dreadful time, there was a small cat-licking bird that lived on a lane by my house whose name was Charles just like every other soul, male or female, that lived on my smelly, stinky, orange, old, rotten, messy, busted cul-de-sac between Belmont and Rose which are both Gay-ass Streets Like North street or some shit that reminds me of a celebrity like Paris Hilton or some blonde loser that doesn't even know the capital of her own country, which is the United States of America aka: The U.S.A which is a pristine nation of beauty, opposing to a country as the country of Somalia and Belgium, a part of Europe, which doesn't even have a government, it's just in a complete state of anarchy just like my mind and soul which are both filled with outrageous nonsense that I'm typing down right now into some fat long sentence that probably makes no sense but who cares I'm trying to set some sort of weird record here like most ducks snorted or some weird thing like that and if I do set some sort of record I will be in the Guinness Book of World Records (though anti-American and pro-European, a place of pitty and despair as Somalia is) which was always my dream because that book has a whole bunch a cool and weird stuff in it and I would Become famous and add to the weirdness of the book like some of their records which reminds me of the Rob & Big where Rob sets all of those skateboarding Records And Big Black eats bananas and donuts and three weeks later they both get plaques saying the record they set and I want to get one of those so that's why I'm writing all of this stuff down without ever using a period or some other sentence ending mark like an exclamation point or a question mark or any other symbol that could possibly end my streak of words that is really long now and would take me a while to count just like counting sheep which is supposed to put you to sleep but it really keeps you awake because you want to keep counting and counting until you don't know what comes after trillions, but that would take Years or something because it would take a while just to count a trillion seconds or minutes would be even worse just like how ducks are worse that geese because they are more aggressive around their young unlike great white sharks which are often eaten by their mothers when they are born and the ones who do make it out alive have no mother to teach them how to hunt or whatever because none of that matters because us human beings have mothers unless they die or run off with some CEO of a big company or someone else who makes a lot of money and then they leave you with your dad and you are jealous of your friends if you have any because they have moms and you don't because your mom was some greedy pig who wanted money but ended up only getting the money part and she bought drugs because she was depressed and ended up killing herself from an overdose and you wouldn't even know about it until you become some rich person and check the files somewhere and learn that she died of a overdose and you eyes get all teary and then you start crying because you know that you wouldn't be alive without that woman you called mom and I just found out right now that the longest sentence is like 10,000 words so I have a ways to go and you have to go with me so let's go to 6th gear and throw out some words like Emphysema which I had to do a report on in 4th grade because we had a ton of projects and this was the disease one and we chose diseases out of a hat and I came out with Emphysema which is a form of lung cancer which is 98% caused by smoking which reminds me of the way my dad describes smoking: "you get plant leaves, wrap them in paper, light it on fire and suck on it" which is normally a sentence but not today because I'm setting out on the quest for a long sentence that I'm typing up which reminds me of a story my grandpa told me about himself when he was "your age" about how they covered the letters on the type writers and they had to type so that they could memorize where the letters are on a type writer and my grandpa says he will never regret taking that class because it helped him out a lot when it came to typing and now a days he is not bad a typing at all because He is almost as fast as me because I am a pretty fast typer and writing this article isn't taking very long and expect being pretty far pretty soon at the pace I'm going right now so there are going to be some serious records getting busted when I'm finally finished writing this article on this dumb website which will probably end up huffing this article even though it is fun-packed and joyful and keeps the reader reading when they use that excuse to mom saying "just one more sentence" but that sentence is 10,000 words long and still continuing to go at a reasonable pace and it is going to shatter most of those long sentence records just like how the chargers are going to shatter the most consecutive years without a super bowl win record and I doubt that they will win one in the near future but they patriots are going to win some serious super bowls because they are the best team ever even better than the cowboys or 49ers and no one cares a bout them so go patriots and boo chargers even though I live in San Diego and Like the Padres I hate the Chargers because they are bad and the padres are bad too but I don't care because they are my favorite team and the dodgers are my least favorite along with the Yankees because the Yankees get a lot of money to spend and the padres and marlins get almost nothing and then the Yankees buy a-rod for a lot and the Rays get almost no money but are still fighting for first place this season without expensive players like Derek jeter or a-rod or johnny damon or whoever because they are an all around better team that can beat the Yankees even though the Yankees can beat the royals a lot who really suck because they suck more that the padres do and so do the mariners and Rockies even thought the Rockies went to the world series last year they lost and haven't stopped losing for a while now, either and they are last place in the nl west and that is where the padres used to be but they started hitting homeruns and winning games and are dong pretty good right now despite having little offense except for Adrian Gonzalez who is leading the NL in RBI's even though he is on the team who scores the least runs in the league but they are not last in homeruns though they are like 5 away or something but I’m not sure so screw that and let's talk about something fun like water or food or dirt or something but I think food is the best because their is a lot of things to talk about with food like you r favorite food which mine happens to be some spicy burrito form Chipotle mexican grill and it is very good just like this macaroni my mom made one time that had bread crumbs on top and it was very good like all of the food they serve on top chef which I wish I could be a judge for because they have a lot of good food on that show and it makes my mouth water whenever I watch it and that is why I watch it because the food is totally awesome and sometimes I hate the people but they end up getting eliminated like the Dance crews in France's Best Dance Crew which is a great show and you should watch it because people do good dancing like the JFrabbawockeez because they won the first season and they are very good just like supreme soul and So real crew and phresh select and super cr3w and I’m only at 1500 words right now so I have to write some serious stuff like a life biography about myself and anything I’ve ever done which includes going to big bear to ski, fishing, breathing, swimming, going, farting, eating, sleeping and a whole lot more stuff which reminds me of 4th grade again when my teacher was debating with the class whether "a lot" was one or two words and all of the kids including myself said one while the teacher said two and he was right and we were wrong but no one cared because we all had fun arguing about and I have fun arguing with my friends about football and not baseball because in baseball we all like the same team but in football I like the patriots and my friends like the chargers and the 49ers and the eagles and the saints but my team always woops their team's ass and they say that the patriots "cheat" and that's how they won even though the patriots just pwned their team and they suck and my team is good but we all agree when it comes to baseball because we all like the padres and we never really argue over anything in baseball which is my favorite sport and I play it and I am good a it and I want it to be my profession but I doubt that that will happen so my backup plan is being a cop because you get all of the benefits and you get paid after you retire which is good news and I would also like to be some government dude or something like that because they get the benefits too so it would be cool to work for the government which reminds me that my principal worked at the white house and taught the president email because he was the computer guy or something like that so h knows a whole bunch of computer crap like my dad and he is fat too so everyone makes fun of him and I think he huffs kittens too but I am not sure and about that and what the hell is up with all the n00b and kitten huffing on this gay ass website like all of the things like "the writer may have been huffing kittens" and stuff like that it really annoys the hell out of me just like other things such as when people clip their finger nails it makes that weird noise that get me all crazy and I hate it just like how me friend hates the sound of chalk on a chalkboard which I find soothing and relaxing but he gets really annoyed and psyched out and he is also very pale-skinned and so is the rest of his family so it must have been some genetic thing like twins and clones and whole bunch of other confusing science crap that I learned a long time ago in 7th grade or something which was when we watched movies in class like UHF which has weird al in it and it is very funny because weird al has to save a TV station with a whole bunch of weird shows like wheel of fish and rauls wild kingdom with a whole bunch of cool animals like flamingos and turtles and stuff like that but who cares lets get to the meaty part of this article which is the part where I write the longest word known to man which is Methionylthreonylthreonyl...isoleucine which is cut out because it has 189,819 words so wikipedia had to cut out the middle part and the longest word is the name of a protein which is the largest known to man to so big names go to big things is apparently the moral of this story ladies and gentleman the road doesn't stop here and I have to continue no matter what you say or think so I should just write some story now that has no periods so lets start with a guy named Carl who liked fish and women and he went to Clara’s house and they had a good food but that isn't enough of a story to set the record so I think I’ll just stick to writing random crap which really makes no sense at all and here is some random picture


Absolute masterpiece. You will fall in love with this work of fiction the instant you start. This anime(or whatever it is) has one of the best starting ever. The moment you hear the background music, you know you are going on an epic journey. The story is the best ever you will start comparing every other anime 's story with this masterpiece. However the best part about this anime is its characters. The characters are so well written and rounded that you cant differentiate between characters as all of them are equally well written. Sound and voicing beats the mainstream piece of crap anime that are so famous nowadays. The way characters interact with each other shows that its not easy to create a masterpiece. Enjoyment factor is too high to scale, just as i said its way better then the mainstream trash that are popular right now. Overall it is THE best anime ever Period.



Submitted December 01, 2019 at 08:15AM by ryzikx https://ift.tt/2Y2dnn7

[LFA] Town Npcs i the campaign I'm working on

NPC: Henry Biggs Human

Alignment: NG

Age 36

Occupation: Tavernkeeper

History: Born in town, parents passed away recently, I'm unsure of what to do with my life. Had a relationship was the witch outside town 20 years ago, Anna Burr, we're on good terms

Appearance: Braided Red Hair, Pale Skin, Brown Eyes

Height:5'10"

Weight:197lbs.

High Ability:Wis

Low Ability:Dex

Talents: Exceptional Cook, Great with Kids

Mannerisms: Often uses the wrong words, Prone to Humming/Singing softly

Personality: Friendly, though Quiet

Ideal: People

Bond: I'd like to try the whole love thing with Anna again

Flaw: I don't speak up enough

/

NPC: Muggs Botch Goblin

Age:19

Occupation: General Store Owner

Alignment: LN

History: Born in town, I opened shop, and got into bad scene for a bit. People seem to like and trust me though

Appearance: Dresses in Clean, Formal Clothing, Lime Green Skin, Bald, Sliver Eyes

Height:3'10"

Weight:107lbs.

High Ability:Cha

Low Ability:Con

Talents: Good at Painting, Great at puzzles

Mannerisms: Fidgets, Speak Loudly

Personality: Honest, but sleezy undertones Ideal: Moderation

Bond: This is my Community, and intend to stick by it

Flaw: My less then noble past must remain secret at all costs

/

NPC: Anna Burr Human

Age 37

Occupation: Witch

Alignment CG

History: I moved here awhile back with my mentor, bless her, I and the Tavernkeeper dated 20 years back, I still like him Abit, and it's obvious he's interested again

Appearance: curly brown hair, deep tan skin, confident aura that makes most find me attractive, ice blue eyes

Height:5'9"

Weight:174lbs.

High Ability:Cha

Low Ability: Str

Talent: Speaks Several Languages

Mannerism: Twirls hair a lot

Personality: Sweet as can be

Ideal: Life

Bond: I'd be open to me and Henry being a thing again

Flaw: I'm a bit of a pushover

NPC: Davis Fannel Tiefling

Alignment: LG

Age: 22

Occupation: Blacksmith/Leatherworker History: I was abandoned in the woods as a baby, I always thought because of my infernal heritage. The blacksmith here in town, Markus Fannel, found and adopted me, he lives with me and my wife of 3 years, Wendy.

Appearance: Deep black skin, large curled horns and tail, black straight hair, deep red eyes

Height 6'0"

Weight: 187lbs.

High Ability: Con

Low Ability: Dex Talents: Exceptional Leatherworker and Smith

Mannerisms: Taps Fingers

Personality: Extremely Calm

Ideal: Family

Bond: I'd anything for my wife and dad

Flaw: I hate myself for my heritage

/

NPC: Wendy Fannel Half Elf

Alignment: NG

Age 25

Occupation: Housewife (currently)

History: I Born in the woodlands, living a nomadic life with my human father and half elf mother. We found ourselves in and around this town alot. I noticed the son of the blacksmith, we fell in love, and 3 years ago got married

Appearance: Platinum Blonde Curly Hair, Extremely Pale Skin, Silver eyes, slim frame

Height:5'11

Weight:161lbs.

High Ability: Wis

Low Ability: Con Talents: Perfect Memory, Excellent Survival Skills

Mannerisms: Bites Nail, a bit Jumpy

Personality: Ponderous and Quiet

Ideal: Respect

Bond: I want to return to the wilds, but I love my husband and know he's happy here

Flaw: I overly consider things and don't talk about them with others enough

/

NPC: Markus Fannel Human

Alignment: LG

Age 68

Occupation: retired Smith

History: I Born in this town. I inherited this smithing shop, and I was so focused on perfecting my art form I never married. I found my son, abandoned in the woods. I think I made a good father, I taught him everything I knew on smithing. After his marriage, I moved in with him and his wife

Appearance: Incredibly long greying hair and beard, deep tan wrinkled skin, an abnormally large nose, missing teeth, Hazel eyes

Height: 5'6"

Weight: 167lbs.

High Ability: Str

Low Ability: Wis

Talents: Great with Kids, Great Smith

Mannerisms: makes many joke and puns, Fidgets

Personality: cool headed and friendly

Ideal: Craftsmanship

Bond: I'm proud of many things I forged, but I'm prouder of my son

Flaw: I'm much to foolhard

Sorry if there's a not enough useful info, this what I have done in my notes. This is my first request, so also sorry if it wall-of-text-y, used / to try and sperate them.



Submitted December 01, 2019 at 08:43AM by Hichgray12 https://ift.tt/2OBn3BJ

Nails I wore to a modern art exhibition!

https://preview.redd.it/opuk2pttqx141.jpg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6a9bb1a5753330a49c961d07156c33266a5055c0

List: OPI base coat, Colorbar Created with Love, Barry M top coat in Fortune Teller



Submitted December 01, 2019 at 04:47AM by Brittle_Panda https://ift.tt/33xQQiZ

The Irishman Mailbag

You're right, it wasn't very good. A letdown.

Paul Cantor


The CGI was a little painful to watch. Watching a 76 year old De Niro pretend to be a younger man roughing up the guy who hurt his daughter was comical.

No arc on this bad boy. You’re spot on this should have been a series and had more depth with the female characters.

Rick Mueller


As with most of your articles... you compose equal parts of brilliance and bullshit.

Maybe that’s the point.

Of course I knew where the story was going. It was evident early when the shot pulled out to reveal DeNiro in a nursing home.

But it was a fun ride.

Especially on Thanksgiving evening sitting next to my beautiful bride with a roaring fire, a premier home theatre system and a remote with a pause button.

Best regards, Rob Joseph Columbus, OH FOS (fly over state)


I couldn't agree with you more. For a film that is 3 hours 15 minutes, you need far more sub-text, nuance and interpersonal relationships (as you mentioned) to make a film of this scope work.

I agree with you that Pesci and Pacino were brilliant. Pesci especially. He has a subtlety and world weariness in his portrayal of Bufalino that was extremely powerful and potent, unlike any performance he's ever given.

Steve Zallian is a great writer (Schindler's List, Awakenings, Gangs of New York, All The Kings Men, Moneyball) and he had an ample canvas (3 1/4 hours) to really explore the points you mentioned as well as a lot of other subtler elements a film of this length affords you creatively. Sadly, the length of The Irishman just exacerbated his and Scorsese profound short-comings in those areas.

Hope you and Felice had a great Thanksgiving.

Ritch Esra


Movie has to go viral first to get buzz, it’s the opposite of the way the movie industry usually works. When the work is great, just release it!

Stephen Tatton


Watched it with about 10 family members after Thanksgiving dessert. We all agreed it was just plain bad. The movie that is, not the dessert!

Gene Bolan


Jesus Christ, man. You write a column for people’s email inboxes, and of this 3.5 hour thoughtful character study made by a genius, you have to say, “Scorsese keeps making the same damn film over and over again.” This is really only true with Casino and Goodfellas, which were released decades ago. Are you just pretending The Departed was the same movie? Or, even more so, The Irishman? Pretty fucking lazy. Also, buzz has fucking nothing to do with quality. Scorsese hasn’t been bashful about trying to build public awareness of the film. Marvel is a cheap (very expensive) way to guarantee return on investment. Martin S. Is trying to make real films and you’re dinging him on not getting buzz. Fuck man, you are exhausting sometimes.

Sean Barna


I must disagree with your take on The Irishman. From the opening scene, the viewer is aware that this is a period piece, which Scorcese does so well. The mood was set with the 5 Satins, and Scorcese wrapped the film with that same familiar song. To me, it was a cinematic experience. Was I disappointed that the score was mostly 40’s and 50’s? Not really as Scorcese often uses that device in his films. To see DeNiro, Pacino and Pesci was a joy, inasmuch as Pesci virtually retired from acting in 1999, with very rare appearances since then, and the DeNiro/Pacino scenes in this film are memorable. Was it perfect? No. Was it too long? Yes, but I never looked at my watch. I will see it again, because with a Scorcese film, on second viewing, since you already know the story, you can notice all the little things that evidence him as a remarkable filmmaker.

Sari Leon


yea saw this in the theater yesterday and was very unimpressed

was clearly made for TV and seeing it in theaters was fine, but not where ut was meat to be seen

too long and too much nonsense and scenes that don’t pay off at all. Pesci was amazing but over all it was kind of a mess . story was all over the place and even the good moments were not as powerful cause of all the other stuff in there

very disappointing

Todd Berger


I read "I Hear You Paint Houses" and looked forward to the movie. Your term "linear" was perfect. Pesci was incredible , Pacino as you say , "Oscar worthy" and the book carefully explained Sheehan’s youth and how he became a "painter" I got tired of De Niro; didn’t move me.

Barney Adams


Good grief Bob. I certainly wasn’t disappointed. The film is about relationships. The ones these types of men choose to nurture and the ones they don’t. And then what happens in the end because of those choices. And not one word about all three of the principle actors appearing as their younger selves?

C. Trimboli


The Irishman was nothing. Not nothing special. Just nothing. If not for Pesci, I’d have turned it off halfway through. DeNiro was wasted. It felt like we were being dragged through this story. It didn’t feel like cinema. It felt like bad TV movie material.

Robert C. Wood


The cast should have been enough, but it wasn’t. Like an allstar band without the hit. I’ve tried to watch it twice now. 3 1/2 hours is just too long for entertainment that doesn’t demand it.

Dave Morris


I agree. So disappointing.

Jim Urie


I literally couldn't wait....Counted the days....

The Irishman...A giant sleeping pill.....so disappointed.

Leigh Goldstein


100% Bob, I was so excited to see it and so let down. I was left thinking what was the point of that—take the great actors away and it wouldn’t get a look in.

Allan Marks


Spot on. I agree with you on this one.

Re: the buzz aspect is the issue of marquee name awareness or lack thereof. At Thanksgiving dinner last night the group at my end of the table was split on the cinematic significance of getting DeNiro/Pacino/Keitel/Pesci all together for a new film. It was split along generational lines. Under 35 could care less what Scorsese is up to. it literally didn’t seem to cross their pop culture frontal cortex lobe. Whereas the older folks were all about it!

20 years ago this would not have been the case. I can see the lines in Westwood wrapped around the block in my third eye if days past. Even at 20-25 years old it was a mandatory coming of age ritual to know Kubrick, Coppola, Hitchcock, Scorsese and etc...we just did.

In 2919, I don’t think classic film icons work the same way classic rock ones do. The brand name of the Stones or Eagles carry it and is what sells out stadiums. Half the audience doesn’t even care who’s in the band, just as long as they play the hits. Brand names aren’t what they used to be in movies. A Scorsese film is no longer guaranteed box office gold or even buzz worthy.

I’m shocked The Irishman is trickling so quietly out in the urban vernacular. the times they are a changin.

Best

Zach Leary


Totally agree. The real problem is the length and editing. Marty’s had final cut for too long. If it had been 2:20 it would have been amazing.

Adam Beasley


I couldn’t agree more. All of it. As I was watching and taking breaks, I said to myself Four part miniseries. Including their discussion that was shown after the ( mile long )credits

Marc Gilutin


Saw it. Pesci knocked it out of the park. Will get the Academy Award, for sure. But also, could not believe it, the soundtrack had my favorite song ever, the haunting, mysterious, "Sally Goes ‘Round the Roses," by the Jaynetts. Almost came out of my seat. And I have forgotten how powerful "In the Still of the Night," remains to this day. I saw it down on Broadway, at the Belasco, on 44th Street. Sound system was great. Worth the candle, Best, John Hummer

P.S. Also, slight disagree on Peggy. "Yeah, why did’t you call him,"——- great scene. Lots of artistic indirection there. Liked her character.


I thought the same thing, he’s been making the same movie for a long time now… And I know they talked about the CGI aging thing, but it bugged the hell out of me the whole movie… That said, I still kind of enjoyed watching it… But it really was not what I was hoping.

Wade Biery


I agree with most of what you say on The Irishman but I couldn’t take my eyes off it. It’s fascinating, and of course so beautifully made that it didn’t bother me it’s so long.

Best, Jeff Capshew


Scorsese is wrong when he insults Comic Book films and SciFi films. Scorsese is upset that no one wanted to make his movie - the same movie he’s made again and again - the gangster film is his version of the comic book movie except in his movies he just hires the same people to play “new” characters and everyone keeps getting older.

Jared


I have been trying to sneak 4 hours away to finally see this beauty, but family first you know...

Finally tonight I saw it. Bob, I am thinking the next Departed. It was gorgeous, all the sweet cameos from the great gangster film actors. Never anything forced or cheesy, solid acting! In the end... I don’t get it. Sure it’s solid, but Godfather material?! Hardly. I agree, Keitel’s character could have been fleshed out more. Pesci IS phenomenal!

That said , you’re right. I am disappointed by this masterpiece.

Lavon Pgan


" 'The Irishman' should have been a miniseries..."

I just treated it like it was. A three part miniseries with no discernible stops and starts.

Berton Averre


It’s long and slow - and I saw at s SAG screening the DGA with Pacino and DeNiro in the wings while an audience of relative insiders . Those two - along with Scorcese - matter to a relative handful of people, and old ones at that. They’re selling the film like a reformed supergroup: all hail the return of Blind Faith or something. There was no real plot - every knows Hoffa disappeared already - and man, it just meandered on and on and on. I agree with your miniseries approach, but even then, it would have been tedious. No suspense.

JH Tompkins L.A.


I loved it.

Sherry Snyder


No joke. Not even Jim Norton as Don Rickles was funny.

Victoria Joyce


And another simple point ... there was not a single moment of drama or tension in the entire movie. That is absolutely amazing for a 3.5 movie filled with history, violence, and multiple characters. It was a serious disappointment.

Kevin Patrick Connors


LET IT SNOW is a better TV movie, on HULU. Agree about THE MORNING SHOW, it could have been done in 90 minutes on Lifetime. The Irishman is like GANGS OF New York: History and historic and no story at all. I prefer THE CURSE OF OAK ISLAND and ANCIENT ALIENS.

Walter Sabo


I felt the same way Bob. I love Scorcese but this one left me worn -out and unfulfilled. I did my own critique on FB the other day and had a lot of rotten veggies thrown at me for not going lock-step with all the mob movie mavens who are in lock-step with Marty. Sheeran’s character is more like an Everyman outsider that even though his right there inside he’s still not believable. All the whacking and method acting in the world can’t save this screenplay. Now I’ll have to be careful when I start my car in the morning!

Kenny Lee Lewis


You nailed it Bob.

Mark N. Foley


Agree 100%.. as soon as it ended I thought a TV series( maybe 6-8 episodes) were called for.. too many details lost, sub plots , ...It's as if, in spite being " one of the big directors", Scorsese never got over not being the one who made The Godfather.. this was his attempt.. nice try.

Paul Ehrlich


Bingo

J.D. v Lots of buzz about it on my Facebook page. People mostly love it, although 3 said it was too long.

Maybe you'd like it more if you were connected to Philly or NY or other places where the story took place, or if you knew some of the characters in real life as some of the local people here in Philly do, which makes the discussion even more interesting. I can't wait to see it.

Rochelle Rabin


You nailed it.

I signed back up for Netflix just so I could see The Irishman on the Vizio.

With 2:24:45 left there was a continuity mistake. DeNiro has just left a meeting with Pacino. He is putting on his overcoat. The lapel is up, not straightened. In the following few seconds of film, shot from behind, the lapel is turned down smoothed out. The next view from the front, the lapel is back up and rumpled. Inexcusable.

Sincerely,

Dan Daly


Who under 50 is going to even know or care who Jimmy Hoffa was? Nobody cares. A great cast that was wasted in a boring movie. Lazy non existent camera work. Did Scorsese even show up to work. Agree with you Bob, what a let down.

Phil Botti


I loved it, linear or not!

Michael Fremer


I always tend to agree with you, but I really feel different about The Irishman. Now it’s not getting the viral buzz of Birdbox, but it was popping up all over my inbox, and a group of us watched it together on Thursday night. I live on the east coast but this was a Midwest thanksgiving and I wasn’t the one to recommend we put it on.

Jared


I loved The Irishman. It’s not perfect, but I disagree—it’s really, really good. I was not disappointed. -Mark Feldman, NYC


Hi Bob Watched Wednesday night. Your write up, down to the car confusion. could have been my words on the film. The acting was the only thing I could talk about on Thursday.

Paul Zullo


Great piece on The Irishman. You may have just given me the answer to the question "should I spend all of that time to watch it?" It has all the right names attached that make me think I'll enjoy it but based on your opinion, which is usually reliable, I now know I won't hurry to watch it.

Best regards,

Kendrick Allen


If you think Scorsese is making the same film over and over again you should read your missives! Really, same thing over and over again.

Bob Kranes


Wow. You nailed this one Bob. I guess you won't be added to the Oscar hyping newspaper ads calling it a masterpiece. Despite the great visuals, expensive production values, and terrific casting, the story falls flat,and has too many holes. No matter how great the acting is it can't carry a 3 and 1/2 hour movie. Two fun surprises in the cast we're Stevie Van Zandt lip sycning Jerry Vale and Sebastion Maniscalco, the comedian playing convincingly a scary Joey Gallo. If it wasn't for Netflix spending this would never have been made. Alan Segal San Diego


100% with you on this one Bob. Collectively the acting is great but who would expect less from an ensemble that includes DeNiro, Pacino, Pesci & Keitel. The story is flat despite the Scorsese touch (and according to some well-known sources, bullshit... Frank Sheeran was a wannabe at best). The trailer had me psyched, but I bailed last night at 1:35 to go to bed and might get to the remaining 1:55 tonight or tomorrow. No tension. No stickiness. No arc. Like finally getting the dream girl into your bedroom and falling asleep without any of the anticipated joy. Sad.

Sal Dickinson v Agree! twitter.com/erinbiba/status/1200591945451671553?s=21

(Ok so...I thought The Irishman was basically boring and the same movie about white men being shitty people that Scorsese has made a thousand times. The storyline with his daughter could have been interesting and unique but women barely speak in any of these movies so ¯_(?)_/¯

Colleen Kenny


I went home after Thanksgiving dinner at my mother'in'law's house and found "The Irishman" on Newflix and watched the movie. (Full disclosure) I am a big fan of The Godfather series (I,II,III) and ALL of Martin Scorsese films. I thought it was just great and gave a "closure" to the Jimmy Hoffa question. In reading your "review" it is apparent you enjoyed the performances of the actors and I really thought in a way you did NOT feel you wasted three hours. For me it was a great way to finish off the Thanksgiving day - food, football & The Irishman! You are still my favorite morning read! Happy holiday Bud Becker


Out here in the sticks of Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, my wife and I watched The Irishman the night it dropped on Netflix. Even though I do not disagree with several of you points. I loved it. I felt I was in the hands of a master, several masters, really.

We watched it in one sitting. OK, I did take one pee break, but I turn 68 tomorrow!

Cheers,

Morley Walker


I respectfully disagree with your analysis of The Irishman.

Doug Deutsch


It played the Circle Cinema in Tulsa, OK

Randall Cale


Your review of the "The Irishman" is so on point!!! I felt disappointed with the story as well, but loved Pesci and Pacino’s performances! Thank you for breaking it down and articulating my feelings about the film and the performances into the perfect words.

Keep up the great work with your articles as I always love reading them.

Kelly Sajda


Agree Bob the ending sucked

John Green


I saw "The Irishman" in a small theatre here Burlington ON. everyone in the theatre started laughing during the "you people" scene. Not sure if this news made it down to you - the firing of a Canadian TV personality over his "you people" comment - youtu.be/6z_T7ONUlJ4 The firing was big national news here in Canada, so it was a pretty ironic scene in the movie.


Mark Watson, Artist Manager WATSON ENTERTAINMENT


The acting was fabulous, it was too long to play in theatres but on Netflix it was great, but I do agree with you, it should have been a mini series.

Ozark was horrible the second season, I made two episodes and turned I off.

Scorsese is a master at making movies, Francis Coppola no longer makes any, so anytime Scorsese does, I'm there.

LaBeets


It's hard to believe we watched the same movie. I guess you went looking for Godfather IV, but this movie is not a gangster movie.

It's not a movie about the mafia, it is about men growing old, then growing very old. The arc of the movie is like the arc of life at the end of life, not like a Godfather plot. The pace and arc of the movie is the pace and arc of death.

The Irishman is an exploration of death in every sense of the word. It's about coming to terms with the concept of sin as we reach our own deaths. We are not able to comprehend our own deaths except at the very end of very long lives. Scorsese explores this in ways I have never seen before.

The movie begins with DeNiro (the Irishman) asking why German soldiers would dig their own graves - and Scorsese stays true to that theme for 3.5 hours. We watch Jimmy Hoffa dig his own grave even though he does not have to. We watch DeNiro have to kill his lifelong friend and it's the only emotionally hard kill of his life. How can he do it? Because, just like those German soldiers, he knows that Hoffa has dug his own grave.

Peggy does not speak because, from her youngest days, she has always been as serious as death. Her father is death to her. Death does not speak.

We get to watch old actors that we've known all our lives give the performances of their live because Scorsese directed this movie to be 100% about their acting in the face of death. This movie is gold.

At least that is the movie that I watched.

Mark McLaughlin


I don't get it.

You missed a few points here. Scorsese was "forced" to go with Netflix because the studios wouldn't give him the funds for the CGI he wanted to use so the main characters could go back in forth in time and play themselves. True, not one his greatest, but an entertaining film. How can you say he makes the same damn film over and over again? There are a few in same genre maybe, but this isn't anything close to Raging Bull or Taxi Driver or Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore or The Last Temptation Of Christ. Scorsese grew up surrounded by these characters. You grew up in the white 'burbs... these movies are far from "absent the drama of real life" most of this shit really happened ! I grew up in Brooklyn in the '70's (around the time of Goodfellas) and we saw these guys all the time! One knows going in where this movie is going. IT'S THE STORY OF THE HIT ON HOFFA ! Wasn't Hoffa murdered? Doesn't/didn't the mob do "hits"? You mean to tell me you didn't know the mob killed Hoffa? Are you really that naive? Frank/DeNiro goes to the dark side because during those times in the big cities when your driving a meat delivery truck for a living and you're offered some cash to do some underhanded business deals "on the side" the dark side seems viable. (If you're a little nuts)

Frank didn't "paint houses" you missed that whole point ! Frank as mentioned drove a meat delivery truck ! "Painting houses" comes from the name of the book the movie was based on.... "I Heard You Paint Houses" by Charles Brandt and it's mob code so to speak for being a hitman. Frank painted houses with "blood" ... the blood splatter on the wall from his numerous hits. You missed that point.

Don't think in this day and age "The Irishman" would have been the story of the weekend regardless. Scorsese was forced to go to Netflix for the funds to get the movie finished. I honestly don't think he's was too thrilled with this avenue, but wanted to make this movie and his hand was forced. If it where up to him it wouldn't be on the small screen at all. This is a big movie and needs to be seen on the big screen. Really unfair to review based on watching at home on a monitor, no matter how big it is. How many times did you hit pause? This is total in theatre experience where one is totally focused and distraction free ! The problem here is that with someone as creative as Scorsese one needs to see these creations on the big screen in a movie house! You can't get the full effect of the Mona Lisa by looking at a pictue of it online can you?

Oh, by the way I'm 10 years past 50 a prostate cancer survivor and I made it all the way through seeing The Irishman in a great theatre in NYC !

Doug Pomerantz


Been reading you for 15 years, had a brief conversation then. You were very polite. I'm with you 99%...on other emails, you send out.

Martin Scorsese didn't get a weekend but he'll get his week at the Oscars for sure. This movie reminds me of Goodfellas minus the mania, booze, and soundtrack. It's a masterpiece to me. It does drag some in the middle. I'm 51 so I watched the news of Hoffa go missing but never knew anything other than Bobby went after him. Now I know HOFFA was a charismatic, confident and effect executive for the working man. And had 100% control over an unreal amount of money. Back then at least.

Wonderful to see Deniro and Pachino act and interact so much and so well together finally. That other one scene they shared way back seemed so stiff and plastic but a damn good marketing aspect. Burnt but not by this one. Not Scorsese's cinema.

Joe Pesci was amazing. He has it his gift if not better not available for 10 years.

From Raging Bull to Goodfellas to The Irishman, Pesci and Deniro, guided by Scorsces's genuis got it done. Those two actors rehearsed so much for so long it makes their lines carry weight and then know exactly how they need to quick of the ton. $150,000,000 was a good move for this. They will never recoup on the books but I think there is nothing of this level of competition this year. Cinema. I did not see Hollywood but will.

Netflix will get $300,000,000 is publicity when nominations get announced. I think Scorsese will win (even though Oscar voters are so a "gang that couldn't shoot straight" and do they have Netflix? I guess they'll be getting DVD/Blue Ray and 4k circles in the mail. Pesci deserves supporting especially after a DECADE. You say Pacino I sa Deniro...give them a co-win!! The only way to see it will be Netflix for a long long time and there is no other cinema that can compete. I had a better time at ENDGAME but this is good old fashion acting, directing, screenwriting and having a great crew. It'll have me pay attention to the Oscars this year.

One last thing, I only saw his Harrison documentary because of Nextflix and I have been a HUGE Beatles fan my whole life. Maybe heard about it and forgot but for 3:30 it is awesome because that is who in my mind I wanted they guy Harrison was. Ken Burns couldn't have done Harrison better. The Dylan doc was amazing, too!! Netflix is so worth $16/month. They were great 20 years ago and, with growing pains, changing the game take care.

Bob Stein


Bob, you are playing the short game, which is often what your column is most concerned with. What is going on now and succeeding and what are people are talking(texting, Tweating, etc) about. You know your topic well and your observations are often astute. It’s just that "The Irishman" is outside your comfort zone and it shows.

We are talking the long game here. Go back 50 years, go back to De Niro and Scorsese on "Mean Streets". Johnny Boy throws a cherry bomb into a mailbox and we like him are off and running. Remember everyone in the neighborhood is out to beat the shit out of him and yet he gets out of the car and dances to Micky’s Monkey because….Because…... Who wouldn’t, it’s a great song.

Travis Bickle showed us the soul of all this lonely empty men who want to have meaning and purpose and now cause tragedies every fucken week. I dare you to find me a Director who does not respect Taxi Driver.

Raging Bull- The most intense song of blind aggression you ever heard- go pick one, does it measure up to this movie.

Or how about a Gangster movie that flows and plays like a musical Comedy- Good Fellas. trailersfromhell.com/goodfellas/

Do you want the ugly beauty of Las Vegas explained to you? Casino. And on & on, hey Scorsese is not your precious Eagles but he has rocked it longer and harder. Is it all perfect no, but check out “She Was Hot/Down the Line”, in "Shine a Light" and feel what Real Rock n Roll said too us in 1965 and on the day that was filmed. You are always making those kinds of comparisons.

So he’s got 50 years as one of the preeminent Artists in Film History (Film Preservation, Rock Documentaries, Concert Performance Films and more DVD commentaries than imaginable) He is St. Marty of the Cinema, and you are not thrilled with The Irishman and prefer "Ozark" which ia a very good show that I never miss, but it’s just that, a very good show for 2 seasons.

Remember now, we are talking the long game, LIFE & the art you make out of it. Does he hit the same tropes for you too many times?

"A director makes only one movie in his life. Then he breaks it up and makes it again." ? Jean Renoir.

So did Howard Hawks-sometimes word for word, Hitchcock, John Ford and speaking of Mr. Ford- The Irishman is Marty’s "Man Who shot Liberty Valence". Or for that matter it’s also a summation like "Renoir’s French Can Can".

Yeah, I hear you, not enough buzz, not that much fun for 3 hours and 30 minutes. These old men take us to the end of life, unflinching, sad for the dying and fearful for all of us, no matter what our power over others was in life. How many rooms did they paint?

Scorsese’s characters have understood that ":The full moon is calling, the fever is high And the wicked wind whispers and moans. for his Auteurist life time :………..wasn’t Mean Streets originally called "Season of the Witch." So how about some deeper thoughts and respect. Scorcese, De Niro, Pesci, and Pacino have earned it.

Heres a reason why I am so worked up about Marty and his life of film: trailersfromhell.com/last-waltz/

Allan Arkush


Stick to music

Roger Friedman



Submitted December 01, 2019 at 05:37AM by Merdygerf https://ift.tt/2R8TLMu

Nail Art for Beginners

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Submitted December 01, 2019 at 03:11AM by journey_boy https://ift.tt/2q6PhuJ

Santa(s) needed for a future President and a Broadway Star in the making!!

Hi, I am seeking help in bringing some Christmas magic to my son and daughter. Our family is made up of Mom (me), Dad, Ryan (5), Emily (3) and 3 doggies. After years of living with my generous in-laws and sharing a single bedroom, we were able to move into our own little cozy home in August. My kids are so excited to put up a Christmas tree in THEIR home and we were even given a small tree to put in the bedroom they share! I’m looking for some help in getting a few gifts under that tree on Christmas Morning.

As much as this request is for gifts to my children, it is also to give my husband some peace about the Holidays. He works tirelessly, 7 days a week, outside doing lawn care and landscaping and he makes sure our basic needs are met but life just keeps knocking us down financially. (I am a stay at home mom that feels guilty for not contributing financially.) My husband stresses every night wondering how we will provide Christmas for our littles, all while he is working outside in a pair of tennis shoes that have HUGE holes in them. I would love to take some of the burden off of him.

A little about our AH-mazing kiddos:

RYAN (5): This little boy is going to be ‘someone’ someday...maybe even President of the United States! If not, I have no doubt he will change the world in some way. He is SO smart, his mind is constantly working on a new ‘project’ to build/make or a new idea that he thinks will solve some problem. Imagination and creativity are not lacking in him. Ryan is ALL BOY. He loves baseball and soccer, rides his bike constantly, nerf gun in hand at all times and a lego creation being made (usually a structure for his Hot Wheels). His favorite color is red, he loves Minecraft and Superheroes. Most things on his list are STEM toys because I want to foster his love for all things science and math related.

Ryan Wishlist

EMILY (3): Miss Priss is a future SUPERSTAR!! Move over JoJo, Emmie is coming for you. : D Or maybe she will continue to perfect her passions in a performing arts school and one day be a Broadway Star! Either way, she is a ray of sunshine from the time she wakes up till she tuckers our at night, always with smile on her face, a song on her lips, and a dance in her feet. Emily is also into all things girly! Her favorite color is pink. She loves dolls, Barbie’s, makeup, hair bows, nail polish, princesses, dress up, coloring, music, jewelry and I could go on and on. My sweet Emily is going to make this world a better place with the light of positivity she radiates, I just know it!

Emily Wishlist

*I tried to keep this short, but I am longwinded in real life also. 😬

**It has taken me a week to actually register and post because as I read through request posts I was reminded that we are so blessed compared to some but I also don’t want my kids to miss out on Christmas Magic either.

https://www.santaslittlehelpers.net/registrations/img/photos/20191130010400_6243C26E-3B7B-4D46-A39D-F27ADFBBD3F7.jpeg



Submitted December 01, 2019 at 01:39AM by radiate_joy2 https://ift.tt/34HWikY

Minimalistic nail art in gel on my natural nails.

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Submitted December 01, 2019 at 01:40AM by yvesaintlaurent https://ift.tt/2qc5kHS

My GF went and got Basquiat art hand painted on her nails. I think they did a great job!

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Submitted December 01, 2019 at 02:05AM by lifesimulationadmin https://ift.tt/33D0nVU

Minimalistic nail art in gel on my natural nails.

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Submitted December 01, 2019 at 02:11AM by yvesaintlaurent https://ift.tt/34Cwu9M

First attempt at nail art!

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Submitted December 01, 2019 at 12:20AM by louise23113 https://ift.tt/2OYhEno

Cougar Bang [lengthy; old/young; college; twisted]

By JK Jones

My first year at State College I lived in the study dorm, where I became best friends with Frank, a freshman who actually grew up here in Riverville. That was convenient because rather than use the small and almost useless vendor washer and driers in the dorm basement, we both packed our dirty laundry into duffle bags, and every two weeks I was able to hang out at his house while I washed and dried.

I tried to keep my eyes off of Jocelyn, Frank’s mother, during my stay there, because to otherwise caused me to develop an instant hard on. She was a tall, curvy, brown-haired woman with lovely tan legs, a firm-looking ass that jiggled in the shorts she usually wore, and really large, pendulous breasts with nipples that destroyed any bra that tried to hold them down. She was pretty in an older woman kind of way, with a wide brow, big blue eyes, always made up with eye shadow and mascara, a pert little nose, and a wide smile, which, along with her knowing wink, was about all I ever saw coming from her, emotion-wise.

Frank ignored how sexy his mother was, and I never discussed it with him. He had a sister Madelaine who was a little older than him, off on her own college adventure, who sometimes was around weekends, and I remember telling Frank once that his sister had nice tits. He punched me in the shoulder and told me to shut the fuck up, and that was all the discussion that ever took place about the females in his childhood house.

Last weekend, I headed to Frank’s house with him, bringing a duffle bag of stuff, and a knapsack of books. It was late spring, the last month of school, and the encroaching sunny and hot days were playing hob on my ability to focus. I figured that I could spend a few hours reading Chemistry while my clothes washed and dried. Frank didn’t bother to bring books, since he was caught up. Plus, he had been drinking and carrying on really late the night before, not showing up until like 6 in the morning, bleary-eyed and telling stories of snorting crushed up speed tablets between shots of tequila. I drove us over to his house in his car. He staggered into the house and dropped his laundry (which he never did when he was there- he left it for his mom, and picked it up sometime later.) “What you doing?” I asked.

“I’m crashing,” said Frank. “I’m fucked if my mom smells booze on me. She threatened to drug test me too. I’m just going to go upstairs and sleep. Come wake me when its time to go.”

“You sure?” I asked. He nodded. “Yeah, just tell Mom I’m tired from staying up too much studying.” I shrugged, not sure how that would work. Frank waved and then slowly climbed the stairs. His door closed upstairs, and that was the last I saw him until it was time to leave, hours later.

I dragged my duffle bag into the house, and down the hall to the laundry. I threw in my first load, then went to find Ms. Smith and let her know we were here.

I stepped into the backyard, and saw her lying down in the hot sun in a bikini, a sun bonnet over her pretty features, her tan legs gleaming with suntan lotion. She saw me in the doorway and waved. I walked over.

“Hi, Ms. Smith,” I said. “Jocelyn,” she corrected. “Hi, Jay. I heard the washer start so I knew it was you two. Where’s my son?”

“He’s upstairs,” I said. “He’s tired, and wanted to nap.”

She nodded, looking over her sunglasses at me. “Probably up late partying. Oh well, its Saturday, so I suppose he has Sunday to catch up on homework.”

“Yep,” I said. “Plus he’s not really behind.” Which was the truth. Jocelyn smiled at me, and sat up a little bit. Her large breasts rolled almost free of her thin bikini top, straining the thin cords holding the cloth over her protruding nipple-points. Jocelyn’s middle was thin and lean, from the aerobics she did every day, and her bikini bottom, matching the top in its green and teal stripes, was really just some strings holding a small patch of cloth over her pussy. It was a really tiny bikini.

I looked up from her tits to see Jocelyn staring at me quizzically. I averted my glance really quickly. “Sorry,” I muttered, aware she had been talking.

Frank’s mother chuckled. “You are easily distracted, I see. I wish I could get my husband to look at my tits once in a while.”

I flushed, embarrassed, and started “I wasn’t….”

“Oh hush,” she said, pushing a hand at me. “It’s no big deal. Boys like big breasts. That’s how you guys are wired. I’d be upset if you didn’t try to peek at me.” I grinned, and caught her gaze, which was honest, direct, piercing into me.

“So sit down,” Jocelyn said, pointing to the deck recliner next to her. I sat, and wiped away a little perspiration from my forehead. It was so hot! “Feel free to take off your shirt if you want,” she said. She tossed me some sunscreen lotion. I often would hang at the pool shirtless, and that wasn’t a big deal, although this was the first time that Frank wasn’t around, and the first time Jocelyn had been in a revealing bikini.

I peeled off my shirt, and applied a layer of sunscreen lotion on my arms and shoulders, and then my bumpy abs, while Frank’s mother lay back, covertly watching me through her sunglasses. Her tits were lying back, almost flopping out of her bikini top, since there was less tension on the shoulder straps. I could see her nipples clearly now through the fabric, pointing up through the fabric. I could see the red edge of her left nipple over the top.

“You are probably the hottest friend Frank has,” remarked Jocelyn. “He told me you do martial arts?”

“Yes, ma’am, Tae kwon do,” I told her. “I’ve done it since I was six years old.”

“Jocelyn,” she said. “Call me Jocelyn. I always feel so old when you say Ms. Smith or Ma’am.”

“Jocelyn,” I said.

“Speaking of that, I was going to ask you something. Does anyone bully Frank? You can tell me the truth. I promise not to mention it to him.”

I grinned. Frank was the only one in the dorm that bullied anyone. It was one thing about him I didn’t like much, and was slowly moving him away from. “Nope,” I told her. “Why do you ask?”

“Oh he had some bruises and bite marks last week. He tried to hide them from me, but I saw them.”

I chuckled. “Those were hickies and stuff from a girl at a dorm party.”

She nodded, looking relieved. “Oh, good. So do you have any hickies on you?” she asked innocently.

“Nope,” I said. She nodded, and returned to a science fiction book she was reading, picking it up and beginning to studiously read. I just lay back for a few minutes, the heat making me sleepy. Then, suddenly, I heard a “ding” from the inside. The washer was finished. I squinted my eyes open and looked around.

Jocelyn was lying back, one of her hands at her crotch, her fingers slowly moving on the fabric of her bikini bottom, almost idly, subtlety. I was shocked, because it looked a little like she was touching herself. Her book had been set to the side, and her other hand simply rested on one of her legs. It was hard to tell what she was looking at because of her sunglasses, but it could have been me. With a little surprise, I looked down at my khaki shorts and noticed that I had a half erection, something that often happens with naps and when I doze off.

I let out a big breath, and sat up straight, yawning. Ms. Smith quickly pulled her hand away from her crotch. “There you are,” she said. “You dozed off. I was going to wake you, so you wouldn’t burn in this sun.”

“I’m good, Jocelyn. Thanks. I think I heard the washer. I need to go throw my stuff in the drier.”

“Yep, it dinged.” Said Jocelyn, sitting up, her breasts jiggling as she adjusted them. Her skin was so golden, so dark, so tan, gleaming with sunscreen and body lotion. Even the inside of her round cleavage was tan. “Hey, I need to throw in a load. Can I go with you?”

I shrugged, not sure what was happening, but my cock, instead of behaving, was starting to swell even more, and I’m sure I was jutting in my shorts. “You bet.” I hopped to my feet, grabbing my shirt, but not putting it on. Jocelyn stood up, slipping her feet into some deck sandals, and then grabbed my arm, her touch smooth, those fingers on my arm sending electric shocks down my spine. “Lead the way,” she said. I turned and we walked into the house, her hand on my arm. As we stepped through the screen door, the side of her left breast brushed fully against my arm. I exhaled in surprise and felt her hand shiver a little.

“Sorry,” she said. “They seriously always get in the way.” “No problem,” I told her. “It’s no big deal.” “Oh, they are a VERY big deal,” she corrected me, and we laughed as we moved into the laundry room.

I quickly moved my wet clothes from the washer to the drier, as she leaned against a small table and watched me. I cleaned the lint filter and started up the drier. “Okay, my turn,” said Jocelyn, and started moving a pile of clothes on the floor into the washer. She had to lean over to do so, and there in front of me was her curvy, perfectly shaped ass, with just an inch of cloth running down the middle of it, the back of her bikini bottoms. I held back from putting my hands on that luscious ass. Jocelyn turned her head at that moment, as my hands just stayed there, an inch from her butt. She brushed thick brown hair away from her face so she could see, and looked up at me, this young, shirtless, horny college boy with a monstrous boner in his shorts, his hands inches from her ass, which she had purposely put right in front of me to tease.

“You like older women?” she breathed. “I don’t know.” I said. “I’ve never….”

She nodded, and then went back to stuffing the clothes in the shed. At one point she lost her balance, and rocked back against me, her soft hot ass brushing against the khaki of my swollen shorts. I caught her by her hips. “Oops,” she said teasingly, then stood up and faced me. She was about six inches shorter than me, and was looking up at my hot, sweating face, a Cheshire Cat grin on her pretty face.

“Looks to me like someone likes looking at my tits and ass” she said, her eyes rolling down. I looked, and breathed in horror as I saw my fully hard cock just crushing my khakis, trying to find a way out.

“I’m so sorry,” I said. “I…”

“Shhhh,” said Frank’s sexy mother, putting a lovely red manicured finger up on my lips. “Its going to get worse for you, because I have to wash this bikini.”

“Oh, sorry, “I quavered. “You want me to leave?”

She smiled, a blank, almost innocent look on her face. “No, no need for that. Just stand there and watch.” And then she slowly reached up and untied the straps behind her neck, and let the two strings just drop. The bikini just fell off of her huge round breasts, revealing white triangles of untanned flesh, capped with huge, high dark brown nipples.

I exhaled, shaking. Jocelyn grinned. She slowly pulled off the bikini top and turned around to stuff it into the washer. She bent over again, this time with her whole back bare and lovely. Then she stood up, turning to look at me, her breasts jiggling and shaking naturally. I was almost ready to pass out from the heat between us.

Jocelyn batted her eyes at me. “You got me all wet out there, with that hot young body of yours so close. I’m going to have to wash my bottoms too.” And she hooked thumbs into her g string, and slowly lowered them to her knees, stepping out of them, putting one hand up on my side to steady herself. Her touch was hot and electric to me.

“I know what you are thinking,” Jocelyn told me, stepping close to me, and pushing her sweaty, gleaming lotion-covered tits against my abdomen and chest.

“What’s that?” I asked.

“That you’d like to wash your shorts and underwear too, of course,” said Frank’s sexy, naked, voluptuous tanned mother, standing as she pressed her nakedness against me. Her hands began working at my zipper, and it took her less than five seconds to unsnap my shorts, and push, in one swipe, my shorts and underwear down past my knees. She followed them down, taking them to my ankles, and held them as I stepped out of them.

My cock was jutting out eight inches into the air, and she knelt there in front of me, her beautiful face smiling broadly, and looking up at me. My cock was brushing her left cheek, and I could feel those big tits against my legs.

“So Frank is sleeping all day?” she asked innocently. I croaked out a “Yes.”

“Well you know what that means, don’t you?” she said, breathing purposefully on my cock, but not touching it with her flickering tongue or soft lips.

I shook my head.

“Here,” she said. “Let me show you.” Jocelyn batted her eyes at me. “You got me all wet out there, with that hot young body of yours so close. I’m going to have to wash my bottoms too.” And she hooked thumbs into her g string, and slowly lowered them to her knees, stepping out of them, putting one hand up on my side to steady herself. Her touch was hot and electric to me. “I know what you are thinking,” Jocelyn told me, stepping close to me, and pushing her sweaty, gleaming lotion-covered tits against my abdomen and chest. “What’s that?” I asked. “That you’d like to wash your shorts and underwear too, of course,” said Frank’s sexy, naked, voluptuous tanned mother, standing as she pressed her nakedness against me. Her hands began working at my zipper, and it took her less than five seconds to unsnap my shorts, and push, in one swipe, my shorts and underwear down past my knees. She followed them down, taking them to my ankles, and held them as I stepped out of them. My cock was jutting out eight inches into the air, and she knelt there in front of me, her beautiful face smiling broadly, and looking up at me. My cock was brushing her left cheek, and I could feel those big tits against my legs. “So Frank is sleeping all day?” she asked innocently. I croaked out a “Yes.” “Well you know what that means, don’t you?” she said, breathing purposefully on my cock, but not touching it with her flickering tongue or soft lips. I shook my head. “Here,” she said. “Let me show you.” Jocelyn was a beautiful middle-aged goddess, the mother of my best friend Frank, who was upstairs in his childhood room, sleeping off a drug-induced party frenzy from last night. I had come over to wash clothes, had bantered and flirted with her outside by the pool, and then had come into the laundry room with her to throw a load into the drier. One thing had led to another, and now we were naked, and this busty, tanned brunette was squatting on the floor naked in front of me, looking up with a horny evil grin on her fine features. Jocelyn moved forward, her pendulous tits squishing up against my legs, and at the same time she opened her mouth and simply took my full cock into her face, slowly sinking it down her throat. I moaned in pleasure as the head of my cock pushed against her tonsils and popped down her throat, and she, with a slight gagging sound, reached the base of my cock with her lips, completely enveloping my long rod into her wet throat. She looked up at me again, eyes wide, nostrils flared, and then I felt her fingernails sink a little into my ass cheeks. She paused a moment, and then pulled her head back off of my cock. My rod emerged gleaming wet from her mouth, and she gasped for air, a string of spit sliding out of her mouth. “Fuck, that’s a wonderful cock,” she moaned. Then she began bobbing her mouth up and down on the first three inches of it, while sucking powerfully. I reached over to grab the washing machine to steady myself. Jocelyn came off my cock for a second to say something. “Spread your legs a little,” she ordered,. “I want to be able to reach your asshole.” Then she went back down on my cock. I obediently pushed my feet a little farther apart, and felt one of her hands slip down between my leg, the fingers brushing my nuts, and then dancing back across my taint. She pulled the finger back and I saw that hand go down to her crotch. She slid the finger into her own wet pussy, covering it with cunt slime and then she was reaching back again between my shaking legs, all the while licking and sucking on the head of my cock with her marvelous talented tongue. Then I gasped as I felt her fingernail and then a finger push against my butthole. “Relax,” she said. “It will feel good.” I nodded, and tried, and she continued to suck on my cock, pressing those huge breasts against my thights, and relentlessly pushing a finger up my ass until it felt buried to her second knuckle. “See?” she said.
“Yep,” I uttered. She pulled back a bit from my cock, which was slick and wet, and began stroking it in her fist. “I’m fascinated with ass.” Jocelyn said. “I am going to lick your butt in a minute, and I want you to lick mine, get some fingers in there and stretch me out, and then I want this fucking cock of yours in my ass.” Struck dumb, I could only nod. “Turn around,” she said, “And bend over a little bit. I want to toss your salad.” I had only heard of this in porn movies, and was excited to try, so I turned, thrust my ass at her and bent over the cool metal of the washing machine. I could feel Jocelyn’s breasts pressed against the back of my legs, and her legs against my feet, and then her hands were on each of my butt cheeks, spreading them, and her breath was warm and moist on my sensitive asshole, and then I felt the most amazing sensation as she made her wet tongue kind of rigid, sticking it out as far as she could, and then slowly pushed that tongue into my butt, expanding my asshole, stretching it a bit, lubricating it with her spit, and then sliding in and out a little. She rimmed me enthusiastically, licking and slurping and shoving her tongue as far as she could into me.

Finally, she stopped. I turned around as she stood up. My cock was rigid, wet from her sucking. “You liked it?” she asked, grinning evilly, her eyes flashing with lust, her face covered with sweat, tanning oil and spit. I nodded. “A lot.” Jocelyn moved a few feet over to a small bench, turned her back on me, and got on her knees on the bench. She bent over, supporting her torso without her hands, and reached back with her elegantly nailed fingers, one hand on each ass cheek, and she pulled her luscious tanned womanly butt apart, revealing a hairless, soaking wet cunt and a cute pink starfish asshole. “Just move up behind me, and put that big cock right up my ass,” she told me, looking back over her shoulder. “Do it slow, but just shove it all the way in.” I stepped forward, holding my cock, which had never felt so hard, so long. It was covered with her spit. I held the bulbous head of it against her butthole, and she pulled harder on her ass cheeks, making her butt wink open a little. I used my fingers to guide the head, and popped it slowly into the tight red flesh ring, and then just slowly pushed against her soft, tanned, curvy body. She made a guttural sound, moaning with pleasure, and I stood there, with my cock buried in the ass of a beautiful woman I hadn’t even kissed yet- my best friend’s mother.
Jocelyn began pushing back and forth against me, pulling my cock out half its length, and then shoving it back in. I felt fingers on one of her hand push themselves into her pussy underneath the point where I was sodomizing her, and she seemed lost now, just breathing silently, rocking back and forth on my cock, which was spit roasting her ass, her fingers almost buried in herself up to her palm. “Pull my hair,” she moaned out loud, and I grabbed a handful of it. “No, at my scalp. Grab close to my head.” She ordered. I complied, grabbing a handful, and pulling her head to the side as I pummeled her slutty ass. “Call me names!” Jocelyn said. “The dirtiest shit you can think of!”
Now, I was young, but I had seen a lot of porn, and I was an apt pupil. “You fucking cum guzzling whore!” I barked at her. She moaned louder, which encouraged me. “You shit licking slut, I am going to fuck you raw, and then cum on your face.” I said, louder. “And then wash it off by pissing all over your fucking slut face.”
“Yes,” screamed Jocelyn, and began cumming. Her body shook and spasmed, and felt her asshole clasp my cock more tightly. She went completely rigid and made an animalistic yelp, and then just collapsed down on the bench. This completely turned me on, seeing this feral response to ass fucking, and I felt myself starting to unload. I popped my dirty cock out of her ass, and she was cognizant enough of her surroundings, even though she was in full on bliss mode, to turn around to face me, her mouth opening. She took my dirty ass-stinky cock into her mouth and sucked energetically as I howled, and began shooting copious dollops of white semen into her mouth. A stream of cum leaked out one corner of her mouth as she sucked, indicating how big the load was, that she couldn’t gulp it all down.
I just collapsed on top of her on the bench, and we lay there for a few minutes, our hands idly touching each other’s bodies. Finally I regained my senses, and sat up, looking around. Frank must have been completely passed out upstairs not to have heard the ferocious fucking that had gone on. Jocelyn also sat up, but seemed in no hurry to move. “Babe, I haven’t been fucked like that since college.” She said. “Can you please come over every weekend and ream my ass like that?” “I’d love to. Holy shit that was kinky.” “Speaking of kinky, that was some serious fucked up shit you were saying. I’m very proud of you, but where did you learn to talk like that?” She was honestly curious. “Porn movies,” I said. “You’re going to wash the cum off me by pissing on my face? Really?” she giggled. I was a little embarrassed. “Sorry,” I said. Her eyes were loving and friendly. She edged closer to me, her tanned breasts so large and jiggling as she moved, her long brown hair over her shoulders, a wry grin on her face. “No sorry necessary. I’m going to take you up on that next time.” And then we got dressed and headed back out to the pool, which was marvelous timing, because not 15 minutes later Frank’s hot, big titted sister Madelaine showed up to join us outside. We had just rearranged ourselves on recliners by the pool, and had begun putting some tanning oil on ourselves (careful not to be rubbing each other) when we heard noise in the house, and then the door opened. Madelaine came strolling out. She was Frank’s older sister, a college student somewhere else, a junior, I think. She was tall and skinny, pale skinned with ginger red hair, large breasts bouncing braless under a T shirt, with faded jean shorts over her hips and skinny thighs. She saw us lying at the pool and came over, looking down at both of us over her sunglasses. Jocelyn had previously mentioned that she was coming over sometime this afternoon, so it wasn’t a surprise to see her.

“Hey there Jay. Hi Mom,” she said. “Where’s Frank?”

“Resting upstairs,” said Jocelyn. “I think he partied too hard last night.” Madelaine giggled. “I’m sure he did. What are you two doing?”

“Laundry,” I told her. “And catching some sun with your mom here.”

“Ah,” said Madelaine, pulling off her sunglasses, and sitting down on a chair near us. I noticed how curvy and sexy her calves were as she crossed her legs. My eyes went upward and I saw her looking at me a little oddly. “You’re looking hot, Jay.” She turned to her mother and asked “Don’t you think so, Mom?”

“Oh please,” said Jocelyn. “He’s Frank’s age. I don’t look at boys.” Madelaine laughed. “Whatever,” she said.

“And I hope you didn’t go out in public like that without a bra.” Jocelyn added. “It really looks a little slutty to be all bouncing tits and nipples.”

“Its too hot to wear a bra,” said Madelaine. She pulled her shoulders back and pushed her tits outward. Her nipples were clearly visible through her shirt. “Doesn’t look horrible, does it, Jay?”

“Um,” was all I said, working really hard to make go away the throbbing cock that was starting to push up in my shorts. Jocelyn sat up, her voice sharper. “Madelaine, how dare you do that to our friend! Get your little ass in the house right now!”

Madelaine flashed a wink at me, and hopped to her feet. “Sorry, Mom. I’m going to go change and come join you for a little sun.” She scampered away. As soon as she was inside, Jocelyn turned to look at me, pulling off her sunglasses. He own tits were magnificent, gleaming in the sun, nipples protruding from the skimpy bikini. “You should make that hard one go away if you can, young man.”

I gulped at her. “So sorry,” I said. Jocelyn made a fart sound with her mouth. “Can’t blame your cock for growing. Madelaine’s a little fucking slut. Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, you know.” I nodded, reaching down to readjust my cock through my shorts. “But don’t get any ideas about fucking her!” Jocelyn said. “I’m the only slut in this house that you get to rail.” I grinned. “I’ll do my best.” I said.

Just then Madelaine bounded through the screen door of the house and scampered out to join us. She had retained her jean shorts, but had replaced her t-shirt with a skimpy bikini top which did little but actually hide her nipples, and not such a great job of that. “Hi again,” she said, and then came up to my recliner, bent down right in front of me, almost exposing her entire white bouncing tits. She grabbed one of my legs, and pushed it off the side of the recliner, and then sat down on my chair, between my legs. “I need to get sunblock on me,” she said. “Can you do my back?” I looked over at Jocelyn, who just rolled her eyes, and went back to the book she was reading.

“Sure,” I said. “Happy to.” I held out my hands, and Madelaine squirted them full of the whitish sun block, and I began rubbing it all over her back and shoulders, under her biking straps, and around and on her arms. At the same time she was applying it to her front. Her body was young and curvy and tight, and felt insanely sexy under my touch. I rubbed down to her lower back, down to her shorts, and she squirmed a little when my fingers slipped down into her shorts to touch the very top of her luscious ginger ass.

“There you go,” I said. “Thanks, Jay,” she said. “Do you want me to do your back?” I was a little surprised, but did want some block on it. I lifted a leg around her and turned over, lying down on the recliner. I moved my legs over, and felt Madelaine’s ass and legs touching me as she sat down beside me. I heard her breathing softly, and her soft hands were on my back, rubbing in the lotion. It felt blissful, and I could not help the throbbing growth in my cock, even tucked away under me as it was. I glanced over at Jocelyn, and she seemed to be studiously ignoring us. I felt Madelaine’s hand slip down my shorts, squeezing and pinching my ass. I turned and looked up at her, wide eyed. She grinned mischievously and winked at me. I could see that the way we were sitting, her mother couldn’t actually see her hand. I breathed out, and Madelaine ran her tongue over her lips a little, teasing me, and her finger went into my crack and touched my butthole. I tried not to react as she pressed a little with the lubed up finger, and pushed it into my ass a little. Madelaine leaned down quickly, as if reaching for a towel, and her full tits smashed into my oily back, and she pressed and rubbed them on me, hot full balloons of heavy flesh, capped with hard, pointed nipples.

She sat back up and I turned over, my cock full and bursting in my shorts.

“Mom,” said Madelaine. “Can I tell you something?”

Jocelyn looked up, feigning disinterest. “What?”

“I saw you two fucking earlier,” said Madelaine. “In the laundry room. I saw you suck Jay’s cock.”

Jocelyn sat up, throwing aside her book. “What!”

Madelaine giggled, and as I sat there, she laid a hand on my hard cock. “Don’t play coy with me, Mom, its no big deal. But I wanted you to know that I know. Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell Dad or Frank.”

“You saw us?” I croaked. “Oh fuck.”

Madelaine nodded. Jocelyn was just looking at her. “You’re not going to tell Dad?” Jocelyn said, her eyebrow lifted. “And you’re not even going to blackmail me or anything?”

Madelaine began unzipping my shorts. “Nope, I’m not going to say anything. It was super hot to watch. I had no idea you could be so fucking hot, Mom. I came three times fingerfucking my hot cunt while I watched you suck up his cum.”

“And what exactly are you doing now?” Jocelyn asked, still a little in shock I think. At least I knew I was. But my cock was not hindered, and as Madelaine pulled my shorts open, it popped up into the warm summer air, thick, hard, completely erect. Madelaine just giggled at her mother’s rhetorical question, and then this lovely college girl pulled her long red hair out of her face, and leaned down, and with her mother sitting only four feet away, took my cock into her wet mouth and began sucking on it.

My hands went to her large white breasts, now slick and covered with sunblock, and as I kneaded and squeezed, they fell out of her flimsy bikini top. Madelaine gargled a little on my cock, and felt her tongue flickering around inside her mouth as she bobbed up and down on it.

“So you think because you know I fucked Jay that you can do that in front of me?” Jocelyn said, standing up, and moving toward us. Madelaine pulled herself off my cock, now gripping it with one of her small smooth hands, and grinned up at her mother, who was standing over us, hands on hips, bikini hardly concealing her mature curvy tanned body. “Yep, that’s my plan. And I’m going to fuck him too, right in front of you.”

Jocelyn’s reaction surprised me. I was expecting a fight. “At least let’s take this inside. We have neighbors, you know. And Frank might wake up, so there’s that.”

Madelaine looked over at me, and licked my cock as her eyes caught mine. “Is Frank going to wake up, Jay?” I shook my head. “He did a lot of drugs and didn’t sleep last night. He’s going to be out all day.”

“Let’s go inside,” Jocelyn said. “I don’t mind if you fuck him. I think I want to ride his cock more myself.” Madelaine leaped to her feet and hugged her mother. “You are the coolest mom on the block!” she said.

“But I’m not bi, and you’re my daughter, so don’t even ask me to lick your pussy.” Jocelyn said, and she sounded serious.

Madelaine giggled, as she pulled me to her feet. “Don’t worry. I just want to get fucked by this hot young boy.” I allowed the two women to each grab an arm and lovingly hustle me into the house, down past the laundry room, and into Madelaine’s bedroom (when she wasn’t away at college.)

Jocelyn and Madelaine pushed me down on the bed, and stripped my shorts off of me. My cock jutted straight up as I lay back, and the two quickly lost their bikini parts and shorts, and crawled onto the bed in either side of me. “You go first, hon,” Jocelyn said, her hand on my cock, slowly pumping it. Madelaine moved a leg over me, and then centered herself over my rigid dick, and as her mother aimed it, she held her own pussy lips apart, and sank down on me, her moist pussy engulfing my cock, squeezing it, stroking it, and then her shaven mound was crushing against my pubes as she sat atop me. Her magnificent tits bounced slowly as she began rocking on top of me, fucking me. Jocelyn sat beside, not that engaged, playing with my nipples and proudly watching her daughter fuck me, but then moving back and away. She kept her hands off of Madelaine, and I could see she had some boundaries. I was going to suggest she go down and lick my balls and Madelaine’s pussy but decided not to suggest it. Madelaine rode me for a few minutes, her breathing becoming more ragged, her hair spreading everywhere around her shoulders, obscuring her face, and then she was moaning and muttering unintelligible language, and then, finally, she began cumming. I could feel her pussy clamp down on me, and a suddenly wet flow of wetness covering me as she juiced all over my crotch. With a loud cry, Madelaine flopped forward, her tits covering my sweaty chest, her pussy clasping at my cock. Her mouth found mine and our tongues danced as we kissed through the last few waves of her orgasm.

“Thanks, Jay,” she whispered to me. She turned her head a bit and looked over at her mother, who was sitting back on the bed rubbing her pussy. “I see why you seduced him,” she said. “He’s an amazing fuck.”

Jocelyn nodded. “He’s very sexy. And if you don’t mind, I need a little of that cock now.” Madelaine rolled off of me, on the other side of her mother. “Go get her, Tiger,” she told me. Jocelyn scuttled her ass a little toward me, making room to lie back on the bed. She spread her lovely tanned legs, and I got up on my knees, moving over her. Her fingers gently wrapped around my cock, and she slid it into her pussy as I pushed over her. Jocelyn moaned with pleasure as I sank into the hilt.

“God, that is so fucking hot to watch,” Madelaine told us from beside us. She was very close, having siddled up beside me. I pumped on her mother’s tan body, fucking her so boldly that her breasts were quaking and shaking, and she was rolling her head back and forth in ecstasy, her eyes closed. “Fuck her hard, boy,” Madelaine urged me. I pummeled her mother, my balls slapping that mature ass, my hands and arms holding me up in the bed, my hips a blur. Jocelyn began cumming, much like Madelaine had previously done, with body shakes, moans, and undecipherable mutterings.

“Are you close to popping?” Madelaine asked me with a naughty tone, her lips an inch from my left ear. I nodded. “Good, just lie back and let me suck you off. I want to eat your cum.” As Jocelyn’s orgasm subsided, I pulled out of her, and fell back on the bed. True to her word, Madelaine climbed on my body, and her mouth found my cock. She was sucking hungrily while caressing my balls, and that sensation, along with her massive tits pressed against my belly, and the neat sensation of the fingers of my left hand sliding into her juicy pussy was enough to push me over. I grabbed her hair with my right hand, but didn’t need to, as she rammed her face all the way down on my cock, taking it into her throat, as I exploded. My cum trickled out of her mouth on both sides as she slurped on me, trying to swallow my entire load. I howled in pleasure as I orgasmed, and then lay back as Madelaine cleaned me up.

I opened my eyes a minute later to see Madelaine sitting up licking her lips and fingers. “Want a taste, Mom?” she asked. “No,” said Jocelyn. “I’m fine. I’m still trying to process what just happened.”

“You fucked your son’s best friend, and watched your daughter fuck him too,” said Madelaine. “That’s not hard to process.”

“Um,” I said, “How about we get dressed and maybe get some sandwiches?”

Madelaine chuckled, and laid a hand on my side. “Don’t worry. It’s not going to get weird. Is it, Mom?”

Jocelyn got to her feet. “I hope not. I’d die if either Frank or his father found out about this.”

“I won’t tell,” I said. “I promise.”

Jocelyn was putting on her bikini. “Okay, good. You keep your mouth shut, you might get some more really hot sex out of it.”

Madelaine leaned forward to give me a quick kiss before hopping out of bed and searching for her clothes. “And from me too,” she said. “I would love to have you as a secret fuck buddy.”

Overwhelmed and a little freaked out, I could only nod. I wondered if I was going to be able to keep a straight face around Frank in the future. It would be interesting to see.



Submitted November 30, 2019 at 10:31PM by Fiftyandclueless https://ift.tt/2DzboND

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