Okay, when I first started putting this together, I though, oh, I will just put a couple up on my profile, so that I can kind of keep track of the trends. Since there are a few thousand posts a month, culling through them there are indeed patterns. The pattern is that basically anything that you can think of can be made into a boundary stomp if the JustNO decides that they don't want to pay attention to what another person thinks, feels, or says.
So with that, let is get on with some more.
Second Post, more boundary stomps
Third Post, more boundary stomps
Fourth Post, even more boundary stomps
Smokers refusing to wash hands to hold baby
So the JustNO's smoke. No big deal. But, because recent studies show that the littlest ones can be impacted by second and third hand smoke, causing an increase in instances of crib death and other things, you ask them to wash their hands before you hand them over to their clutches.
Of course this starts WWIII, you are inconsiderate and disrespectful (you know that respect only goes one way, that is towards them, they don't havet to respect you.) Link
Hoarding
So you have to live with your JustNO, who is a hoarder. She is filling you and your kids room with "stuff." Every day there is more. You are enabling because you are paying rent, so this rent offsets the expense of what they can buy.
Hoarders have a huge emotional investment in their stuff. So in a way you attack their hoard, you are attacking them. Wanting to reduce the hoard, and moving stuff out of your son's room is an attack on her. Yes, the stuff is more important than the people around them.
so you should probably start making a move sooner rather than later, before it becomes a health, safty and security issue.
Is this right? No. Is this the way it is. Yes. Asking a hoarder to get rid of stuff is probably a non-starter.
One way to approach the problem is to make the issue about safety. It is absolutely that there be escape routes and paths out of the building. If there are two beds and blankets that are preventing an egress through the window, then that has to be remedied.
A second problem is the possible CPS visit. Growing up in a cluttered environment is not healthy for children, and they will remove the child from that environment. If the hoard is bad enough, then you should leave before that happens. You can say that it is unacceptable to have the hoard encroach on your living space, but it is really difficult to manage the encroachment to the other shared spaces in the house, like kitchen countertops and the dining room table, which is usually piled high with new purchases.
Bait and Switch, inviting your JustNO without you knowing
You get an invite from your friend/relative that you get along with well. You show up and sitting at the table is your JustNO. The friend/relative thought it was time for you two to get over it and mend your relationship. No. Just NO!
Or you drop your kid off to your relative who you trust to babysit for the 2 and a half hours while you and your SO go see a movie. You realize when you pick up the child that your relative has invited your JustNO parent(s) over while you were out to spend time with your little one, who you have expressly forbidden contact. While you are furious with the relative to allow such access, especially without discussing it, the real blame goes to the JustNO. Link
Interrupting your sleep
yesterday, my mom came in and saw I was trying to sleep. She grabbed my toe, started rubbing my nail (a feeling I cannot shake) and asked if I was sleeping, then asked about my toenails. I got angry and told her to stop, and she laughed, rubbed my toe again, then left. I was so infuriated I almost started crying because of how tired I was and how rude she was. She was picking fights with my dad all day yesterday.
She does this quite often (the sleeping thing). She’ll see someone is asleep, or at least laying down with their eyes closed, and she’ll go and wake them up to ask if they’re asleep. It makes me so fucking mad. I have sleeping issues due to my OCD and constant paranoia, so managing to fall asleep before 230 AM is a big deal to me, but she will come into my room and say, “Oh, you’re asleep already? Why? What’s wrong?” and touch me. The urge to clock her just grows more and more each time.
I don't have words. There is something seriously wrong with this JustNO. There is a reason why they use sleep deprivation as a form of torture. This is abuse, plain an simple. Since they are not beating you or berating you or calling you names, this JustNO is flying under the radar, but it is serious abuse, and the JustNO is getting off on making someone very upset when they are vulnerable.
Smokers refusing to wash hands to hold baby
So the JustNO's smoke. No big deal. But, because recent studies show that the littlest ones can be impacted by second and third hand smoke, causing an increase in instances of crib death and other things, you ask them to wash their hands before you hand them over to their clutches.
Of course this starts WWIII, you are inconsiderate and disrespectful (you know that respect only goes one way, that is towards them, they don't havet to respect you.) Link
Submitted July 30, 2019 at 07:19PM by ForwardPlenty https://ift.tt/2OqC6Qz
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