Hi y'all. Long time commenter, rarely poster because I have issues and typing old shit out makes me relive emotions for which I don't have spoons 99% of the time. Because every time I get my head a little bit near functionality life goes "LOL no" and kicks me in the fucking teeth. And new stuff is often too much so I can't adult for a while, let alone type it all down in a coherent manner in what is not my first language.
I have named my MIL Plumbum (Pb) because she's either as dense as lead or just as toxic - the jury is still out on that one. Also because I like science and physics and shit. She's been in my life for more than a decade, even longer for my SIL who is married to BIL1.
This just happened, so I don't have to relive old emotions to share it. Yay? Fair warning: I ramble and can't very well differentiate between important details and fluff. Also, none of the following was said in English, so if something sounds weird or stilted, you know why.
So if you go and check my post history you'll see that the relationship with my parents has been tough lately. I haven't shared it, but I walked out of therapy with them mid February after realising that the proverbial flogged horse is dead. Next, my last living grandmother gets an express ride in an ambulance because she nearly died (she's doing well considering and is back home). Then last week I hear that my last living grandfather has cancer. So things have been rough even without considering my mental health is shitty to start with.
My other half (seriously yes, he's awesome) and I have a thing on Sunday, where we see FIL and Pb shortly when they arrive and we leave. FIL asked me how I was doing. I answer honestly, referring to both my grandparents' poor health. He gives me a hug and sympathy. Plumbum stands next to him, overhears this, and interjects "wel that's a part of life, huhuhuhuuuu... It sucks but that's how it is".
Rant incoming. Because I need to before I go on, and for all his qualities, OH doesn't enjoy me bitching about Pb.
First of all, bitch, your mother and mother in law are both pushing three digits and still kicking so STFU about my grandfolks who are much younger than either.
Second, I'm thirtymumbles and contrary to what you believe not an idiot, I know life is like this - I lost three grandparents (long story) since I started dating your son AND may I remind you about the funeral of your late only BIL, you dinghy? Your otherwise oh so sensitive arse was more interested in OH and my home improvement than anything else and didn't shed a tear, you raging cankle, by the way, I haven't forgotten. I know loss. Doesn't mean I have to like it, you unsympathetic troll.
Thirdly, I will forever be impressed with humans in general because you still have your own front teeth despite your habit of LAUGHING when you should show sympathy, remorse, embarrassment or any other not fucking glee like emotion, you harebrained little goblin.
Fourth, have you never in your next to seventy years been told your voice sucks? I'm not bothered by nails on a chalkboard but your voice is worse than hearing a three year old manhandling a violin. Shut the fuck up.
Fifth, I wasn't talking to you and like usual I DIDN'T FUCKING ASK YOUR OPINION. You always push in where you're neither needed or wanted. Be grateful that my martial arts include practicing self restraint - again, especially for your front teeth.
Sixth, for once in your life think before you open your fucking dicktrap. How the fuck FIL can stand being married to you is a damn mystery - no wonder he's found so much activities away from you since he retired. You're a blunt, rude, and inconsiderate banshee.
Seventh, just fuck you.
Where was I. Right. So, Plumbum shows her arse in public so I resist the urge to tear her a well deserved new asshole. But my face fell - side note, I will never play poker. My face wont allow it. So my expression goes from "polite medium" to "I just dropped my ice cream" and she goes "uh-oh".
For whoever is now thinking "is she five years old/ a Teletubby?" You have a good grasp on her general behaviour. She seriously said "uh-oh" when she saw that her words upset me. And nothing else.
Again, not the time or place to read her the riot act she deserves. I walked away. Not sure what FIL thought of all that, but again, he put a ring on it.
Deep inhales
So thanks for listening. Stay awesome.
Submitted March 31, 2019 at 10:54PM by Mulanisabamf https://ift.tt/2FMOvbf
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